I had been waiting with suicide, hoping I'd get a girlfriend when school starts. But I just realized that I'm going to be an IT specialist.. there are no girls in that class.. there were none last year.. I guess that's... how it's supposed to be then.. What is starting to bother me kinda, although I like it, are the dreams I see EVERY night... absolutely every night I meen a girl... I have a girlfriend.... we kiss ... every night.. not always the same girl, but that doesn't matter... The previous night I was with the girl I have been in love with the most... and with whom I screwed it up the most.. but fuck that... I'm going to either be in an eternal dream once I die and be happy, or just be DEAD ... and fucking happy... Oh, and btw, if you have a problem with me cursing then fuck you! this is a suicide forum, place where peaople are meant to express their feelings!