Why am I even still alive

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Sondenise, Apr 2, 2010.

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  1. Sondenise

    Sondenise Member

    I just, I dont' even know why I get out of bed in the morning or at all anymore. Just so I can go to a job I no longer enjoy? and it's not just my depression that has cause me to no longer enjoy my job, but the stress of it. It's a high stress job and I'm not allowed to say anything really. Nothing that matters. They ask for input, I throw in some ideas and they're always shot down. in the two years i've been here not once has any of my ideas or suggestions ever been taken into consideration. i'm unhappy with my boyfriend and i jsut wish everyone would leave me alone. my medication stopped working for about a month now, and i called the clinic to get an appointment but they're closed for good friday and won't be open until monday. i'm not even sure if i hope i can make it that long.

    nothing makes me happy anymore. i don't enjoy anything.
  2. VonBlown

    VonBlown Well-Known Member

    I'm sure once you get some new medicine you'll be a happier person. And probably enjoy your job and boyfriend more.

    If not you seem like a capable person, you could get a new job and new boyfriend if you like. Be happy you still have these options, I'm sure you can enjoy the rest of the time you have here on earth.
  3. IV2010

    IV2010 Well-Known Member

    Hang on till the clinic opens.....
    talk here as often as you like....there will be someone about to support you through the weekend....
    you did the right thing ringing the clinic...shows you still have the will to live ...
    try to get by hour by hour if you have to.....but don't give up...
    changing the meds can make a difference....
    when you're feeling better then maybe consider changing jobs and chucking the boyfriend..or not..
    take care..
  4. Sondenise

    Sondenise Member

    it seems like a job would be very hard to come by, especially when all you have is an associate's degree and am only 23 years of age. Also, since I live on my own with no support from anyone at all, i don't know if i could make enough at another job. I really wanted to move away to another city, but I still have a very long time before i could save up enough money to do that.
  5. Lunar Pixie

    Lunar Pixie Member

    seems you might be the smart type, why donĀ“t you try developing some great skills, to stun people, sometimes and (sadly), skills, intellectual and social atributes are a great tool in our modern world, everyone is demanding a lot nowadays, i think that what you might need is to challenge yourself into new fields, to prove yourself you can go higher than you ever thought,

    eventually one day, from the joy of your performances, you might come across those memories of the days you felt sad and feel suprissed of how small and easy to overcome that problem was
  6. IV2010

    IV2010 Well-Known Member

    thinking of you......(((hugs)))
  7. Autumn01

    Autumn01 Well-Known Member

    I don't know why I'm here anymore either.
    I'll always be useless. I need to just end my misery once and for all and die.
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