I've been feeling suicidal for months, and I keep putting it off. Why am I not dead yet? I keep thinking about what my options are or what the future will be like for me, and I always end up with the same conclusion: 1. I'm a failure. 2. I'm worthless. 3. I'm a useless lump. 4. I will never accomplish anything. 5. My depression is too much for me. I can't get over it. It's too much work. 6. I would be better off dead. 7. Death is the most logical, rational option for me! I failed all my classes this semester because I was depressed. My ex broke up with me because he couldn't handle my being depressed and suicidal. Now I'm living at home while all my peers are accomplishing things and moving on with their lives. I just can't do it. I can't be charismatic and land prestigious internships. I can't be really active in a bunch of student organizations and have a big network of friends and business contacts. I can't accomplish anything I want to. I should just die die die die. There's nothing for me anymore! All I do is cry and try to sleep so I don't have to be conscious. Thinking about getting help like therapy or meds seems pointless. I don't feel like I have the energy to help myself. Depression is too much for me to overcome.