Lately, I've just been so sad. Even in the midst of a happy moment, I can feel myself holding back sad tears. Usually when I think about death, I start to panic because I just cannot fathom "nothingness." (I don't believe in heaven/hell/etc.) But now, it doesn't bother me. That fear was the only thing holding me back from death for the longest time and now that it's gone I don't know what I'm going to do. I'm just so sad.