Sorry if I'm morbid. I have much to love in my life. Yet what was important to me seems gone. I know I get very sad at times, especially when there is no sun, but usually I have something that keeps me hanging on til I feel better. That something has been my kids. No I seem to have been replaced and unneeded, unnoticed. I have been married for nearly 25 years and have 4 wonderful children. Everyone (except my parents) tells me how wonderful they are turning out. I have several things I want to teach them, and I want to show them life and companionship, but I have been replaced entirely by video games. Please don't tell me to order them off. Their father overrides me and allows them to spend the entire day on those things. It's gotten so bad that my 6yr old has cried because we had to leave the house for 1 hour and it's my fault he couldn't play his game. All four kids play all day from after school til bedtime - in the same room! The noise is grating. I have nothing against the game, just the results. Dinner is gone. Food will be made and left to sit because they can't stop. Husband comes home and disappears into his own den to play games that cause him to scream and cuss. If I don't force them off at bedtime, they will play all night. I can't play these games, they cause panic and frustration, so I have lost my entire family. I wanted to teach them music, reading, travel and the beauty in the world. I insisted on swim lessons, taught them to ski and tried to socialize as a family. All have been rejected. My oldest son can speak of nothing except whatever game he's playing. I have nothing even to discuss. These people were my coping mechanism. They were why I didn't end it all. They don't need me anymore. So why am I here? I go to school and teach kids who groan about what they have to listen to. Who don't complete homework. And aren't required to! I work a second job to help make ends meet and then my husband just spends more than we've earned on computer parts or more xboxes so that the precious children don't have to even take turns. Everything I stand for and fight for has been rejected. It has been three days since I've stopped asking them to do anything, and none of them has even noticed. I really need some perpective. How do you find hope and desire to continue when everywhere you turn you are rejected? I'd volunteer, but have been repeatedly told I'm not needed. Plus the little kids need an adult at home legally. Plus I'm working two jobs, and there isn't much to volunteer for around those times. I did sign up to make blankets for Project Linus. It was supposed to be a family thing, but as usual the family bailed. I have no friends. I moved states so my husband could have a better job, and have been unable to get beyond aquantance stage with anyone. I am so tired of being alone and feeling so unloved.