why are some people so mean?

Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by Donnanobispacem, Dec 13, 2014.

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  1. Donnanobispacem

    Donnanobispacem Well-Known Member

    I rack my brains sometimes to try to understand, but why are some people so unpleasant and unhelpful? I can understand intellectually personality disorder but on another level- why do they target the vulnerable so much?

    Hate it.
  2. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    I was bullied all my life, first by other kids, teachers then by a boyfriend. I have NO idea why people can be so cruel and mean. I do not have it in me to be mean to another human being no matter what the situation is. I'm quite shy, sensitive, the opposite to a bully. It's about making them feel better, bettering their self esteem by bringing others around them down however I do not know how this pans out for them long term. As said in the movie mean girls, calling someone stupid isn't going to make you any smarter and calling someone fat isn't going to make you any thinner.

    As a side note- I see this is posted in the crisis forum, are you okay? x
  3. Donnanobispacem

    Donnanobispacem Well-Known Member

    Thanks Petal, I have been a basket-case tonight...all because of one person's comments in chat! I don't know if they meant to be so abrasive and dismissive...but that's the second time it's happened on here, the first to someone else. Both people were from the UK, which when I lived there was known for good manners, I guess something changed!

    I am ok, though my attempts to talk to my son about my illness and practicalities didn't end well, he left in tears...

    It does make me feel more like the world would be a better place without me instead of dragging everything out.
  4. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    Hi hun, oh it's on site yeah that can be a problem because you cannot read what they may really mean, in between the lines. They may be trying tough love or they may be having a hard day themselves. I'm sorry it hasn't been the first time it's happened....you just have to be cautious here because of people on strong medications or people in different states of mind, you just never know. I hope this settles for you and does not happen again if it does you may bring it to out attention and we'll try and deal with it but in saying that I myself even give people some lee way on here because of their possible state of mind.

    I'm sorry it did not work out well with your son, maybe try a different approach? Or maybe shut it down with him as he may not understand. It's sometimes okay to put on a front as long as you're not doing it with the wrong people such as professionals.

    I think you are a really cool and nice person and the world would be a little darker without you. :peace:
  5. DrownedFishOnFire

    DrownedFishOnFire Seeing is Believing Forum Pro SF Supporter

    If you feel wronged in chat, please report it if it violates the forums rules. I would like to see the chat as a place for anybody to feel welcomed (can't please everybody) but if one is being mean it's more likely to make more than one person uncomfortable. Sometimes there are trolls or like Petal said, having a bad day. But if it is happening more than once, by the same persons then report it.
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