I am so tired of my miserable life. Then why do you ask am I still here because someone has always come and checked on me and found me. Now I have nobody I have lost everyone except my children. I could do it and nobody would be here to find me. But then I think about my kids but it hurts too much I haven't been happy in such a long time. But then if I did something would I fail again. My hope is gone that life can be good. I just want to leave on my own terms is that really that bad?