why can't she see whats going on

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by justmeonlyme, May 12, 2010.

  1. justmeonlyme

    justmeonlyme Long Time SFer Staff Alumni

    i got up this morning for school and as always i had this great fear of leaving the house but it felt even worse this morning i said to mum i cant go she asked my why not and i said i cant (i dont have a very good relationship with my mum we cant talk about things she has no clue what goes on) she thought that it was just that i didn't want to go to school she couldn't see how scared i was of going i just wish she could see whats going on even though i no that i do everything possible to hide it i still wish she could see whats happening to me but i cant show her idk what im really going on about im in a prity shitty place right now....
    im also starting to considering leaving sf but i kinda dont want to at the same time im not really sure...
  2. toffeekitten

    toffeekitten Well-Known Member

    Hey, I understand what your going through. You want your mum to notice so she can show you some care and help you, but at the same time you want it to be kept secret and are terrified of her finding out. Is there anyway that you could just give her some small hints that you are struggling? Or write her a letter telling her and lave it for her to find?
    Hope that helps xxxx
  3. justmeonlyme

    justmeonlyme Long Time SFer Staff Alumni

    idk I've tried to leave hints and stuff but i cant really do that eather ive spent so long hiding everything it just feels wrong even leaving any sort of hints that somethings wrong i cant right her a letter i dont think i could write it knowing that she was going to read it
  4. carekitty

    carekitty Guest

    Giving hints is never going to work. No matter how much we want people to know and understand us, it will never happen unless we take that chance, and open up and tell them. It's hard, because it can make us vulnerable, but people can't read our minds, or our feelings. I didn't take that chance with my mom before she died, and I'll always be sorry that I didn't. We didn't have a good relationship at all, but it might have been different if one of us had opened up to the other.

    Sometimes we might even find that people around us welcome the chance to get to know us better. And if for some reason they don't, there are other people out there who can listen. School counselors, or other family members, or even the parents of one of our friends might be able to hear us.

    You know you can always pm me if you need to talk. :hug:
  5. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Talk with your doctor your teacher a coucillor at school If you cannot open up to your mom opening up to someone else can be easier and allow them to talk to your mom for you. You need to open up to get the help you need to stay well okay Talk to councillor at your school today and phone your doctor as well.
  6. justmeonlyme

    justmeonlyme Long Time SFer Staff Alumni

    ive been talking to a consular for ages now but she doesn't help i stopped telling her whats going on coz when i did she prity much just ignored the major things like i told her that i was suicidal and she just said i would stop wanting to do this when i changed my thoughts and that she didn't think i was that much of a risk of doing it coz at the time i had no plan but i was still very close and really wanted to i told her that but she still just brushed it off im not talking to processionals!!!