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Why continue when I am dead already

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this poem I wrote is my daily thoughts and life

I'm sitting here all alone and yet again
I'm thinking of my life my past being relived
all I can see is pain, and a lot of tears
That's how I remeber my life hurt, sadness, suffering and sorrow
Many days that my tears bled inside of my brave face
my hope has all gone , evaporated like a puddle in the sun
I want to say goodbye for everyday I live I start again and die inside
How could anyone ever love someone who is already dead.

My journey to this end was a long process starting from being molested for 3 years as a child ,drinking ,partying, living wreckless and wild then to having loved and been destroyed now 3 times in my life I am divorced she did cheat she hid it from me for our entire marriage then just confessed one day 11 years dissolved in one moment after we were apart I was diagnosed with leukemia I died for 82 seconds and am here today but I know somehow that it was my time and I have cheated death I am at peace with my decision the joys of life long since past and all that is left is my own personal hell on earth I am hollow with nothing left I am truly ready this time.


Staff Alumni
Hi and welcome...many of us know what it is like to walk around like 'the living dead', and many of us, myself included, now have a life worth living...please know that there are ppl here for you to share your story with and gain/give insight and support...welcome again, J

total eclipse

SF Friend
Staff Alumni
been there too hun but there is a way back okay hang out here we care make new friends you will see people care here You can pm me anytime hugs
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