Why did you keep coming back to SF?

A little bit of addiction and a craving to be around others who don't judge as readily as people I know in reality.

 

A mixture of hope and despair.

 

I follow and can relate to do much of the heart ache on here. I want to help people, too , but it's hard when helping myself is such a struggle. Maybe just knowing I'm not the only 'crazy' one out there in this big bad world.

 

Loneliness and despair. Im barely social and just try to make the day pass so addicted to the chat room.

 

To meet new people and keep in touch with the friends I have. I can be open about things here that I wouldn't post on any other site. I would feel strange about freely posting about suicidal feelings and things on Facebook. I'm not sure that many people there would understand.

 

I'm trying to build up the courage to talk and not feel so alone.

 

I haphazardly type "suicide" into the address bar and a cookie pops up as I press the enter key, and it brings me here. It's as if my laptop knows what's up and is saying "Stfu--but actually talk to somebody or whatever."

 

I feel very lonely and coming to SF gives me little relief.

 

i feel alone.. and it's a good place to rant..

 

Helping others to seek the light whilst I exist in the darkness.

 

The people. The amazing, caring people that are here. And the hope that I can touch at least one life in a positive fashion.

 

I checked out this site not too long ago when I was feeling quite desperate. I've gotten some very useful feed-back and feel as if I am on the verge of some sort of revelation. There is a freedom to discuss things that I could never discuss with anyone. I feel as if there are people here who are actively helping lift this sense of despair, darkness and paralysis that has held me prisoner for a long time.

 

I come back because I choose to come back and I choose to come back because there are obviously some very caring, non judgemental people around this place and right now, I need that in my life as I am experiencing things I have never experienced before.

If someone here helps me and I can return the favour, it will be a very rewarding exercise because I really do care about a lot of people who share the same shit as me right now.

 

To remind myself that I am not alone. I discovered this one day when I was feeling very suicidal. It has helped me a lot, to know YES there are other people going through the same emotions as myself.

 

hmmmm

A lack of support everywhere else. The fact I have to sail through the day with a smile on my face and when all leave ... i'm left with me again. the mask comes off and I look around and no one is there. I'm lost.. alone.. to be on earth with so many people and not 1 person is there .... that's enough to make you feel like you're worthless (as it does me)
so.. I know here .. this is the best place where i'll find people who are feeling the same. When i'm tired.. I don't have to explain because the fact i'm here just says enough. And that's comforting, i'm not alone. I don't have to fake a smile or lie that i'm ok. I can talk if I want to , and If I can't do that, I can try and help someone else not feel so alone.
That gives you a feeling of being worth something.. only if for today.

Whn you're depressed you notice the time passing, so carefully. And you can sit for 3 hours and just realize you've been staring into space or something. And then you feel like you wasted time ... did nothing achieved nothing... more time wasted in life. (Those kind of thoughts) but here, it keeps the brain focused, even if it's not kittens and flowers.. you can do something with the time, that's productive... because productive is also trying to help ourselves.

I've been before, but I was much worse off.. in the sense I was set on leaving. But i'm here ... it did do something. it didn't cure me but it saved me those nights I felt terrible. Those small moments in time count...
i'm grateful. we're not labels, we're humans who are brave to admit to another we're not strong as the world sees us as being. That's a special thing everyone should be proud of. And to everyone who is feeling terrible and replies to others.. be proud of yourself. The ones who have less are always those who give.

It's so easy for the brain to be hazed over and our thoughts and thought patterns and ways of thinking can become so skewed .. our thoughts are everything.. they lead to actions and choices. This.. is just a place to help where ever you're at. better or worse.. one thing stands 1- you're not alone 2- this place is here 24/7 3- people care

Grateful.

 

It's a relief to know that I am not the only one that feels the way I do. I like helping others because it takes my mind off of own personal situation for a little while. Here is the first place I've really felt accepted that people cared about me. I never had that before. I come to read other peoples stories in far worse situations than my own and if they can overcome ; why can't I? I am extremely lonely here I feel like people give a damn about me and my situation.

 

You are a wonderful person!!! I give a damn. I might not say it often enough, but I care and give a damn. Xoxo to you

 

I think this is the first time in years that I'm actually replying to threads and not just writing in my diary.

I think it's just remembering all the times I was in a lot of pain and I could vent about it here. I guess is reminds me of all that I've overcome, but in a good way.