Why Do I do It?

Discussion in 'Mental Health Disorders' started by BK_Jetsfan, Dec 5, 2011.

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  1. BK_Jetsfan

    BK_Jetsfan Well-Known Member

    I loathe, repeat LOATHE, when I am told I want to be depressed. But there are times that I have to imagine I do. Subconsciously or something. Because I have a tendency to randomly do things I KNOW will only result in my feeling sad or insecure. Like I'll look into things I know will send me into such sadness that my breathing becomes labored and my stomach churns. I have done such things twice today. What the fuck is wrong with me?
  2. Animosity

    Animosity Forum & Chat Buddy

    There is absolutely nothing wrong with you. I've found myself doing that too. If you need to talk, im here. <3
  3. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    As already been said hun there is nothing wrong with you Sometimes we just get more comfortable in an emotion that we have come accustomed to
  4. fromthatshow

    fromthatshow Staff Alumni

    If you've been depressed for a while, it becomes uncomfortable to feel anything else. I think it is scary sometimes to think about getting better. Depression is a feeling that I know. I am used to it. I can always rely upon those feelings. Whereas other feeling fluctuate, are less able to control (for me at least), and are less reliable. There's nothing wrong with you. We all do it.
  5. BrinkOfExistence

    BrinkOfExistence Well-Known Member

    I'm guilty of doing this to, there was a time when i would actually ask my ex girlfriend to tell me what she had done (sexually) with guys just so i could feel that heavy knot in my stomach, thinking about it now i really can't believe i use to ask actually i can't believe she even told me, just crazy.
  6. BK_Jetsfan

    BK_Jetsfan Well-Known Member

    Thanks all for trying to make me feel "normal." My gf says the same things most of you have said, it's what I'm comfortable with because I'm so accustomed to it. But it sucks ass. And BOE, I'm pretty much in that same boat. I pry into my gf's life knowing that whatever I find will most likely give me that knot you spoke of. It's really fucking insane that I choose to do this to myself.
  7. MorganaNever

    MorganaNever Well-Known Member


    The things you fear that can randomly happen to you mess everything up. By inviting them yourself you stop the anticipation and feel you control them more, even though the feeling you create is pain. But something in you believes that pain will happen either way.

    That's just my idea of course, don't mind that I wrote it as a statement.
  8. Cariad_Bach

    Cariad_Bach Staff Alumni

    Yes! I do this! I thought I was really awful person! Thank you so much for asking this question. Is so comforting to know for some of us its kinda normal.
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