hey hun, this world has dumped a lot of sh*t on a lot of people. i dont mean to undermine your pain, but maybe if you can open up a bit, peeps here might be able to offer you an alternative. i have come to realise living is the hardest thing we have to do, everything else is easy.
if you feel you can, let us know what pains you so much and maybe you will find some support.
i am a newb here, but am so glad i found this place..no one judges you, they will support you, and want nothing in return, that is how i would describe a friend.
you will have hard times..jeez we all do..but we have each other to turn to and know that no one will think any less of you. stay in touch