Why do people commit suicide?

Discussion in 'I Have a Question...' started by Sakura, Aug 23, 2009.

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  1. Sakura

    Sakura Well-Known Member

    It's not because we want to be selfish and cruel to those around us who do actually give a damn about us. It's because we just can't live through another day of the hurt, pain, and anguish that has built up in our hearts and minds. At least this is what I believe. Others have many other beliefs as to why people commit suicide. So, what reasons do you think people commit suicide for? Is it because some are just being selfish, and really don't care/want to care about others anymore? Or because they just can't deal with the pain anymore? Or are there other reasons?
     
  2. Shogun

    Shogun Well-Known Member

    Like most things in life, people do things for a variety of reasons. I believe most are not doing it for selfish reasons though. I think it's actually selfish wanting a troubled soul to continue living with his/her emotional (and sometimes physical) pain just so you get to spend a bit more time with them.

    Most people don't want to hurt loved ones, but the pain is simply unbearable and therefore they cannot take anymore. Human beings are just that, human beings and as such we can only tolerate so much before we start to take drastic or extreme action. We're not machines built with an unbreakable coping mechanism.
     
  3. Sakura

    Sakura Well-Known Member

    That's exactly how I feel. But when I try to explain this to others, they bring out the usual "you are being selfish and cruel" line, and begin guilt tripping.
     
  4. Shogun

    Shogun Well-Known Member

    I don't really wanna cause any conflict in your personal life, but whenever anybody says that to me I respond with "you're being selfish and cruel by wanting me to stay."

    You have to remember though, they do have your best interests at heart. Even if they're misguided.
     
  5. Sakura

    Sakura Well-Known Member

    Thanks for taking the time to give the replies that you have. It's very much appreciated ^^
     
  6. rosalee

    rosalee Well-Known Member

    The only time somebody pulled the "suicide is selfish" aphorism on me, I didn't have a snappy comeback ready. I just said that I knew it was wrong, but I couldn't help wanting it anyway. I don't remember exactly what they said to that, but I do think the conversation moved in a different direction. I suppose it's part of the value of not being defensive in an argument, in that I was essentially willing to say they were right and defer -- but not everybody's a doormat like I am. :dry:

    In my experience, being shamed by the people you're attempting to seek help from really, REALLY fans the flames of a suicidal crisis. If somebody were to tell me I was selfish, I'd think, 'Yeah, you're absolutely right. That's why I want to do the world a favor and dispose of myself.'

    Ugh. I'm sorry I'm being so negative. Anyway, the point is, guilt trips are never an effective tactic in any relationship, let alone a relationship where one of the parties is in a compromised condition and needs help. It absolutely sucks that so many of the people we reach out to for support don't get it, though. At least I have you guys. :hug:
     
  7. ashes_away

    ashes_away Well-Known Member

    I too don't think it is because they are selfish but can't bear the pain any longer.Its easy and common to accuse suicidal people of being selfish ,but that means people are not seeing the cause behind the desire.Some people make weak attempts and those are cries for help...I just don't think it is fair to accuse suicidal people of being selfish..it is pouring salt on an open wound...and then there are those who commit suicide out of guilt for something they may have done and cannot live with the consequences.It isn't really anyone's right to call someone who commits suicide (or wants to) selfish.
     
  8. I am not sure why people do this? I have been asking myself this question since my father committed suicide a few months ago. All I can say is if you MUST leave this world, don't leave any questions for those who left behind that will live with the guilt for a lifetime. Everyday I ask myself "what more could we have done?" "why didn't I see any signs?" "Why didn't he love me and my children enough to stay?" "What can I do now that he is gone to tell him how much I loved him" I know in my heart that he KNEW we loved him. I know that he was in physical pain. He always said he would do this when he thought he was too old. I just didn't realize it was so soon and his idea of too old and mine were apparently different. My mother will NEVER recover. Never. He checked out on us to deal with his pain and left us a mountain of pain that seems insurmountable.
     
  9. silent_enigma

    silent_enigma Well-Known Member

    It sucks that the world is full of pain. For those who leave and those who are left.
     
  10. I am getting sick of everything. Relatives, loved ones, work, life, games and even myself.
    This world is so unjust... I am going to say good bye to everything soon
     
  11. Juliet

    Juliet Member

    Yes that's true. It's so sad.
     
  12. Darker Than Black

    Darker Than Black Well-Known Member

    thats a stupid question, considering y we all here
     
  13. yursomedicated

    yursomedicated Chat & Forum Buddy

    Everyone has their own story, their own reasons.
     
  14. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    Something about life just becomes to difficult to deal with.
     
  15. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    My brother did it because no one cared enough to reach out to him he thought no one cared he was wrong
     
  16. elpepo

    elpepo Active Member

    I think because they want the pain to stop. Though it is possible that some people have other bizarre motives, like wanting to see the afterlife or - like terrorist - fullfil what they think is a "holy" mission.
     
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