why do we do this?

[Wastingecho]

why do we keep going?

there comes a point where the pain is so intense that it steals the air from out lungs, the strengh from our muscles, the reason from our minds and the eloquence from our speech - and yet we are expected to keep going day after day after day

how does this make sense?

i need to know

 

[ASolitaryBlue]

it doesnt make sense. and i dont know why we keep going. im only going now bc a couple people here kept me going last night...
but i know that the desire to end it all must make sense somehow. and the desire to keep going has to make sense somehow. but this pain like you said, it steals the air from our lungs, i fine myself not being able to breathe. how can we go on like this?
ugh nothing i say even makes any sense

 

[total eclipse]

Hey too some it doesn't make sense but we know that each day we have here is another day we can try to heal try to reach out and help others. I try so hard to not let the pain win so i can stay and help my daughter. Sometimes i wonder why as i am such a mess but to leave her would destroy her so what choice do we have live with our pain or pass our pain how deep it is on to the ones we love I can't i just can't see me ever passing this pain on not intentionally but if the day comes something happens i hope to god they forgive me i really do.

 

[pinkpetals33]

I know....I barely have enough body weight to hold me so perhaps I'll get a on way ticket sooner.....I'm drained, exhausted and cant envison going to see my doctor next week. He doesn't have hope for me so all I do is go and keep him in business.....even then I may lose my job b/c I only have 4 weeks to get bette...........so yes, I thought about "WHY" tonite....sat in the car alone for a few hours crying.....starting at "WHY?" and ending with "WHY?"

 

[Wastingecho]

i'm running out of reasons to stay

 

[Aurora Gory Alice]

Because (and I am not religious) but we are told when we die we will be welcomed into the kingdom of heaven where we will be at peace.
But then again we are also told only if we give our lives to God and believe in him with our entire heart & soul and if we don't take our own lives.

I dunno... it seems too difficult to do either.

 

[Rukia]

I can only speak for myself, but I keep going because I think it's better that I'm in pain instead of anyone else. Last night I didn't remember that.

 

[swimmergirl]

we stay because leaving is so permanent, so final, the human spirit has a built in survival mechanism, which is very difficult to override despite great pain and suffering.

The only reason why we are still here is because we believe there is a reason to be here.

 

[Chargette]

I don't know about this pain that haunts me from deep within. The only reason I have for it at the moment is an answer I used to give my kids when I didn't have words for them. And that answer is: "Just because."

I'm sticking around, "just because" I'm sticking around. I have learned I can live in the here and now by doing the little things "just for today."

Today is all I have. I turned to God by asking him to be my Lord and Savior by my faith in Jesus Christ. That Jesus died for my sins, was buried, and was raised from the dead three days later. When I did that, I asked God to be my life manager and I would do the footwork.

Since doing that a lot has happened that is clearly God's doing. I'm not a transformed person. I'm still suicidal and I still have my pain. These things will be with me until my resurrection after I die. I've put the duration of my life in the hands of God. I will die when he takes me, not by my own hand.

My reason for living is to share the good news about Jesus Christ because of his work in my life. I don't go out with a big band and make grandiose announcements. My testimony is simple and matter of fact in my conversations in the course of my daily living.

In the meantime, I continue with my simple life and crocheting and knitting with the women at the knitting groups. Simple and rewarding.

These are the kinds of things that are a salve to the pain I have inside.

 

[Wastingecho]

i have no faith - seen, been through too much to simply accept anything as god's will or part of god's plan

 

[pinkpetals33]

i'm running out of reasons to stay

Like you said to me , "Hang in There."

 

[Wastingecho]

what's the point

 

[ASolitaryBlue]

there isn't one.

 

[Wastingecho]

that's what i thought

 

[ASolitaryBlue]

i wish there was one to be found.
that might make this all a bit easier.

 

[swimmergirl]

I cant really answer your question, I am the last person to be looking for answers from, but I hope my friendship is at least a start to an answer to your questions.

thinking about you.

 

[brokenandlonely]

I completely can relate to this post, there comes a point in our lives that for me the pain is just to unbearable at times but there are things that keep us going day to day on our everyday lives. These things might be something simple or it's more complicated. For myself, It's honestly the love and care I have from my close friends and family.. I could never leave them in pain with my loss. I hope this adds something constructive to this post but I am a believer that finding the positives in life and finding something to live for is a great start.

 

[Wastingecho]

i can't find any positives

 

[swimmergirl]

try harder.

 

[max0718]

Hi Wastingecho,

I think the point for sticking around that is usually floated is that things may get better. The one thing certain about life is that it's uncertain. You don't know what the future may bring.

But I know that reason rarely means anything when we're depressed and can't see anything past the pain we're going through in that moment. I guess you should look at reasons forcing you to stay, while waiting and working for something that will make you want to stay. A couple of years ago when I was at my worst, it was just the inevitable pain that I knew may family would go through that kept me from going through with anything. But even that was barely enough to keep me going. I can't remember a specific moment that things changed, and although I'm still struggling with my own baggage, I'm much better off now than I was 2 years ago.

Look for the little things in everyday life that you enjoy and start working from there.

I really hope you can find the motivation you're looking for!
All the best!

Max