Why do we hate ourselves?

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#41
we hate ourselves when we are being very self-focused.
we do it because of selfishness.

selfLESS people do not hate themselves because they are pouring all their energy into helping others.
 
A

Aquariamethystea

#43
we hate ourselves when we are being very self-focused.
we do it because of selfishness.

selfLESS people do not hate themselves because they are pouring all their energy into helping others.

Selfless people can suffer greatly and can be suicidal too. Not every suicidal person is a selfish person.
 
G

ggg456

#44
selfLESS people do not hate themselves because they are pouring all their energy into helping others.

Nah loads of people who 'help others' might be doing it out of self hatred because they can't channel their energy towards themselves, or they could be doing it for some kind of self-worth or some status within a certain group. I've been like that in the past (not the status thing/self-worth, I hate the idea of having any kind of power over anybody) and I'm directing a lot towards myself as my therapist made me aware in the summer that I have too much feeling/empathy for others and only anger towards myself- and it feels a wonderful, very important change for me.

People have taught me to hate myself since I was young. I have a lot of things going against me. My mother finds it amazing that I say she influenced my eating disorder when she said that nobody would ever want to be with me when I was around 14- that I didn't fulfill her dream of girly teenager obsessed with makeup and boys.
 
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#46
When you think about it the root of our hate for oneself comes from past mistakes. When you do something that you wish you could change later on, it gets to you and it comes to a point where you cant even have the strength to get up in the morning or to look at yourself in the mirror without wanting to throw yourself thru a wall. One thing I've learned thru all of life's misconceptions is that you get one chance at everything, and that everything is a matter of choice and it's our responsibility to oneself to do right or regret will come knocking on your door.
 
M

madasafishbone

#47
You described me, how I was this past year. And yeah I hated myself. I hated myself for not being able to do what others can do. I hated myself for not having any friends and feeling like a failure in this sense. I hated myself for being unable to cope with an unstable sister, I hated myself for not being able to 'save' my family, I hated myself for having to leave home, I hated myself for being 'weak' and withdrawing from a course, I hated myself for feeling alienated from the one place I thought I felt slightly okay (university) and the world in general, I hated myself for not being able to go back to the course, I hated myself for not being able to approach people, I hated myself for being scared of people, I hated myself for hiding all the time. I hated my pathetic self harming routines. I hated feeling unloved. I hated feeling empty. I hated wasting my time and dissociating because I couldn't take the anxiety over whether I could start my degree or not...I don't know.

But then I realised I didn't need to do all those things. Mainly I read a book in the summer my girlfriend had 'Nobody Passes'..which made me think a lot and I found myself relating to it a lot. And my girlfriend has helped me realise we both are different and we both aren't going to fit into the world and I'm glad I have someone like that in my life. I've also gone through a lot these few months which has made me stronger in a lot of ways..
Well Done!!!
 
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