Why do you hate me?

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Borrowed time*

Well-Known Member
#1
Why do you hate me Mum? What did i ever do that was so wrong?
Im not an angel by any means. I get angry, i swear and argue back. I know you dont love me, i know you dont like to be seen with me but why the hate? I stay away, mind my own business but its not enough is it?
I have never been physically violent to you like L, G and M. I have never stolen from you like the others. I always help you at the drop of a hat and i always will you know that. Am i being selfish just asking for something in return? Just an acknowledgement of my presence, you dont need to walk out of the room when ever i walk in. You dont need to take it out on my dog just because you dont want to talk to me or even look at me. You dont need to lock me out of the house when you know full well i dont have a key.
There was a time when i wanted you to hug me, tell me everything would be ok. Now all i want is for you to say hello...how are you? Is that asking too much?
Why do you tell me you want me gone then tell everyone else you are looking for a new house and taking me with you? You confuse me so much. Please stop.

I make this promise to you Mum, one way or the other very soon i will be gone.
Only then i believe you will be happy with me as a daughter.
Im sorry i have been such a dissapointment to you.
 
#4
I can sympathize with how you're feeling. I don't know what to tell myself, and I don't know what to tell you. I can't give advice without being insensitive, and I can't just regurgitate a stock phrase to you without lying.

I hope you can figure out how to deal with it your own way. There's no way I can tell you anything other than that.
 

Sadeyes

Staff Alumni
#5
I am so sad that your mother's opinion of you has become a 'truth'...people form their opinions from their perceptions which do not seem to be the person you are...big hugs, J
 

Borrowed time*

Well-Known Member
#6
Thank you everyone
But I must really be a horrible person or dysfunctional in some way, I just havnt worked how yet. I'm from a large family, they can't all be wrong. The only person talking to me is my little sister and that is only because of an incident in august. I'm just enjoying the little bit of company she gives me before she turns her back on me again.
You would think I would be used to the loneliness and being ignored but it just gets harder. It's the first thing on my mind every night when I go to bed and when I wake up.
 
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