Why do you think that its hope that keeps us here?

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by touglytobeloved, Jun 26, 2009.

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  1. touglytobeloved

    touglytobeloved Well-Known Member

    Its not always hope. And whenever i read a message like: you are still alive , so deep inside you still hope., i feel like i have to reply and deny it, but i dont do that because i dont want to trigger someone or jump in his thread, because maybe he still hope. But i want to say that in some cases its not hope that keeps us here, but its fear of failure, hospitals, fear of hurting others. Its not hope.
    The real reason that keeps me now is because i dont have a method that is 100% certain. The only thing that can provide peacefull and fairly certain death is miles away from me, its ilegal here, i cant get it without risking jail.
    So FEAR keeps me alive, not HOPE.
    I just wanted to vent and say this...
  2. depleted_soul

    depleted_soul Well-Known Member

    I have to say that I agree with you. I don't have any hope left so that is not what's keeping me here. The only thing that is keeping me here is not being sure that my attempt would be successful. I don't want to try and fail and wake up in a hospital somewhere having to deal with more misery. For those who do have hope keeping them here, I think it's good that they have something to hold on to. But I know that I do not.
  3. Bambi

    Bambi Well-Known Member

    It is not hope that keeps me here as my method is considered 99% foolproof but I guess it is fear of some sort that I just can't admit defeat just yet ..can't admit total failure. I stated a thread you can check out called what stops you as I wondering the same thing too. I know a part of it is courage as all the papers and notes are in order.
    When I was younger and I knew my methods were 70% at best but I still tried but now that it is 100% I am faced with an absolute finality that scares me and makes me sad. Sad because I was a meaningful human being and have the training that allows me to be of service and to help others but have become just a useless person. So it is not hope but rather stubbornness to admit and accept what to obviously needs to be done and the courage to drink that simple cocktail that will end it all. Sorry for rambling I get choked up on this subject.
  4. shades

    shades Staff Alumni

    For me it is hope and the fact that my mother can't live without me. If I find that there's no hope after she dies, which may be soon or 5 years or more, then I'll know if hope is enough. I already have a 100% fool proof method.
  5. LenaLunacy

    LenaLunacy Well-Known Member

    I disagree, whether you believe it's hope or not there is always some hope inside of you. There is always hope we just don't always know it. However i do understand what you are saying, sometimes there are other things keeping us here, other than hope, perhaps fear, perhaps the effect on other people. But does it matter what keeps you alive? Your alive and to me that is the important thing. :hug:
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