Everytime things start getting better for me they soon take a nosedive back down. I don't see a point in continuing the struggle except that I don't want my mom to hurt if I killed myself. But damn it's hard. I'm living with my family again after moving out of my appartment (I was hearing stuff and my doctor didn't want me to be alone). But my folks usually just ignore me and I tend to be by myself a lot. My meds don't stop the suicidal feelings from coming back, they only calm me down a bit so I feel like I'm on my own. I had to leave school (again) because of this so now I won't be around anyone I know at college since I keep getting myself behind. I have to start all over again trying to make friends. I feel like I lost all the progress I made. I guess what I wanted to ask is if anyone feels the same way that I do, like, I can see the light at the end of the tunnel but I can never reach it. No matter what I do I come around full circle to where I was before. I'm really tired of this constant fight with depression and don't know how long I'm going to keep it up.