i dont know what to do anymore, can anyone give me advice? i feel like no matter what i do its shit like every time i move forward something pulls me back and i feel like literally ill. if i have to regress completely i will really lose my mind. the people i've known dont care about anything and im like a fly l to them. to me they're so depressing and i have to get away theres no other choice i always screw up everything though when there's pressure involved and my portfolio class made my perfectionist stark mad about details and apparently i "dont care enough" about what i want to do now because i screwed it but i am depressive over these things i want to throw up being a perfectionist and also avoidant of people makes me want to purge myself, never eat anything. drink tons of water. i kind of think of people who drink tons of water on ecstasy but i never do ecstasy whats it called when you're like this is there a name for it? i think its more complicated than being "bipolar" id like an alternative if its possible. to purging myself i mean. if it makes me feel more in control i always try to have control but i just dont this is why im scared everyday i dont care about being in a relationship or anything i guess that's the only thing i have going for me help?