Why don't I deserve support?

Discussion in 'I Have a Question...' started by Madam Mim, Dec 7, 2010.

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  1. Madam Mim

    Madam Mim Well-Known Member

    I live in a constant depressive state, which I am used to, as are my family and friends. But when things get worse, and I'm reaching crisis, no-one ever wants to know, or seems to care. I know others here experience this, and was wondering how you cope with it?

    I've been told many times that I'm a 'helper person', and I am. I am the one all my friends and family come to when they need something. As tedious as that can get, it's what defines me. I am a helpful, supportive person. If anyone is feeling low, they come to me, and I can nearly always help them and cheer them up.

    When I reach out, actually tell people how I am feeling, people who I have supported through their tough times (which I actually thought was nothing compared to what I and others here live with every day), and they ignore me. Why am I expected to be there for them, night and day, but not receive support in return? Why is life so unfair? Why should I bother?

    Mim
     
  2. Fitzy

    Fitzy Well-Known Member

    You do deserve support! I think that people struggle with others if they step out of their 'role' e.g. I always present as cheerful and when I tell people I am chronically depressed they don't believe me - it's as though they don't have the emotional intelligence to accept it. If they thought about it they would have to change how they relate and that may be just too hard?
    I'm not sure if that makes sense?
     
  3. bluegrey

    bluegrey Antiquities Friend

    Maybe your friends feel they cannot relate your feelings resulting from a serious mental illness. Their frame of reference is of the normal highs and lows of people who could almost never imagine the severe pain and restrictions of chronic clinical depression.

    Most people are also simply unappreciative of too many of their blessings and your kindness certainly is one of them.
     
  4. Madam Mim

    Madam Mim Well-Known Member

    Thank you both for your replies. I think you're right, I think that they just can't understand the depth of my low points. I wish there was some way to communicate it to them, because it hurts me when people don't seem to take me seriously and brush my feelings aside. It makes me feel as though I don't matter.

    Mim
     
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