Why don't I feel anymore ?

Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by AJE, Mar 31, 2016.

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  1. AJE

    AJE Well-Known Member

    I havnt been to work for over 2 weeks, I havnt seen my kids for almost the same length of time,
    Why does none of that bother me ??
    I've missed some counselling sessions & been away as I couldn't face being in familiar territory any longer & not caring if friends or family missed me.
    Everywhere I go at my home area just reminds me of my wife & it's so hard to be positive.
    I just want to move away for good as I find it all too painful being around people & places I know.
    I know my kids & family would be upset but it really doesn't bother me though I know it should.
    Im currently 500 miles from home & I really don't want to go back.
    Everything there just makes me think of her & I just can't seem to cope & it's been nearly 3 months since I last spoke to her but the pain isn't getting any better.
    I seem to have lost all empathy with everyone including my kids, it doesn't bother me how it will affect them if I move away.
    Why she has affected me so bad I just don't know but I've lost all positive thinking since being away from her.
    I really don't know if I'm ill or just really sad.
    Meds not working at the moment.
    I've lost enjoyment in everything in my life.
  2. ThePhantomLady

    ThePhantomLady Safety and Support SF Supporter

    Can't you call your doctor and have them look at your meds? Maybe they need some adjustment?

    I'm sorry you're going through this, but it's a strength that you realize it is happening. Use that knowledge and try to work against yourself.

    Heartbreak is hard, especially when it happens in such a way yours did... I know it's a cliché to say that time heals but it does... I remember my biology teacher told us that it takes the body and brain at least 6 months to recover after a breakup. So don't lose all hope.

    Please try to call your therapist as well to let them know what is going on. If you really can't bear going to that area perhaps they can give you some counselling over the phone?

    Be kind to yourself. Try and do things you enjoy... did you have hobbies before all of this?
    AJE likes this.
  3. AJE

    AJE Well-Known Member

    Thanks for the kind words & advice.
    Yes I will see my doctor & try to get myself motivated.
    It just seems so hard right now, my get up go is very thin on the ground.
    Thanks phantomlady
  4. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    ((hugs)) I was going to reply to this thread last night but I got too drowsy and fell asleep. I'm sorry!

    I hope you do as @ThePhantomLady said and see if you need your medications tweaked, if you feel you don't have anything to live for then find something but I also know it's very hard to find motivation when you are deep in depression, I hope talking here to us has helped. Does music have any effect on your mind?
    Please stay and keep talking to us hun, think of us as a crutch, there to help you when you need us. I wish you all the best :)
    AJE likes this.
  5. AJE

    AJE Well-Known Member

    Thanks Petal
    No worries about last last night, I was tired too.
    Many people on here have been very supportive & just today I've had txts from people I didn't think we're that bothered but really I'm surprised how concerned they all are.
    This really is a great forum to let out your feelings.
    I know I can always come on here & no one will belittle how I feel or tell me to snap out of it.
    Certain music I can listen to but most modern stuff brings back too many memories that hurt too deep still.
    I'm feeling more positive today thanks to lots of support I've been having from here & people in general.
    I went missing this week leaving a txt implying I was going to do something bad to myself.
    I regret doing so now as so many people have shown their love & support for me.
    I caused a big rumpus with police etc: searching many days for me.
    I feel embarrassed by it but at the time I just had to get away or I'd of gone mad.
    My thinking is a bit clearer now but it's still so hard to look forward with optimism.
    Thankyou all on here, you really are amazing.
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