Why don't people like me

[Stylez]

I've never been close to anyone in my life. I never felt the sense of being in love. Why does by bastard dad have to move so much. Doesnt he know thats what made me fucked up.

This board is not helping, please someone be real with me, insult me, critiqsize me, just do something so i know im not alone in my mind.

i dont want to post my whole life story, i just want some attention because i have no other places to go. 2 more days until school please god help me to make it through these days and to have a new attitude by school time so i can succeed.

WHy dont you people like me?

 

[shellz]

what makes you think that we dont like you?

if you want us to be real with you then you should tell us why your like this..like, whats going on??

 

[Marshmallow]

We can't help you just like that, we can support you but you have to help yourself aswell.

There is no reason for us to dislike you.

 

[Forgotten_Man]

Well I have only just met you. So right now I am neutral on you.

All I can say to you is that you are not alone in being liked by most people. I was blessed with one person to take an interest in me. Otherwise I am hated or ignored as well.

If it is attention you want I can give you some. If you want you can PM me and yell or talk or anything. I am not too well liked here either.

 

[ace]

I've never been close to anyone in my life. I never felt the sense of being in love. Why does by bastard dad have to move so much. Doesnt he know thats what made me fucked up.

This board is not helping, please someone be real with me, insult me, critiqsize me, just do something so i know im not alone in my mind.

i dont want to post my whole life story, i just want some attention because i have no other places to go. 2 more days until school please god help me to make it through these days and to have a new attitude by school time so i can succeed.

WHy dont you people like me?

Alienation sorry I don't know your real name(It's Jonathan I presume?),the simple fact here is that people on these board's will be real with you in that way they won't insult you,criticise you,make fun of you or the like.Simply because we have no reason to,you've done nothing to any of us to make us do that and I can understand how you're feeling.Please give people a chance to like you,in your head you get the feeling at times that everyone hate's you or dislikes you for some reason and the real truth is that is not the case.
It's actually called Personalization that is the term for it where we think someone is thinking something it mainly would be a negative feeling of course.Listen what I suggest is you go with the flow I'm sorry your dad has moved alot and it has made thing's difficult for you,but trust me you can really do well from talking to us and that I guarantee.
Another thing I want to reassure you of is that you're worthy extremely that and so much more that I couldn't possibly describe.Can I ask do you have some friends that you hang out with?I just viewed your website and you're wonderfully talented I truly believe and have gorgeous friends'dude try to go with the flow and take it easy if you ever need to talk I'm here for you later Buddy!

 

[Stylez]

truly appreciate the kind words bro.....

your response to my post has given me the confidence to be ready for school tomorrow. I almost want to ask is why are you so genunily caring about me. This is a whole new experience for me. As you know feeling alienated can creep up on you when you meet new people.

If you don't mind asking why do you find me talented? is it because the way i write. becasue one of my college teachers said i had a gift for writing and a flow to the way that i wrote. but after she wrote me that compliment i think it came to my head in further assignments and by the way she graded the assisgnments, she acted like she never made the comment in the first place.

If you don't mind can you go more into when you said: "Can I ask do you have some friends that you hang out with?I just viewed your website and you're wonderfully talented I truly believe and have gorgeous friends'dude try to go with the flow and take it easy if you ever need to talk I'm here for you later Buddy!"

i think ill try to go with the flow becasue i made it to school time.

Again its strange to say for me that you are my friend or to lesser extent and truly genuine, compassionate person. Please reply I think I'm starting to realize im not a freak and that the therapists and support groups and the meds, are not what make me a freak, that they are there truley to get to make me feel..... normal.

 

[ace]

I'm glad you found the confidence to go to school and I certainly hope it went well,In terms of finding you talented I can see certain values and factors that just stand out about you.You are no freak it's just something inside of you that makes you feel some what different to other's and the like but you're no freak.As individual's you know of course that none of us are certainly the same but we tend to feel at times that we're weird,strange a freak etc.
it's quite strange that a teacher would say that you have a gift then act like she/he never said that,but in speaking like that I think it's us who think that somehow we aren't valued enough or the positive nice comments made about us can't be true so we actually believe that.
The reason I asked if you have regular friends that you hang out with was because I was wondering how you find that and do you enjoy those moments with them?In terms of being compassionate it's just that I understand the horrible feeling of depression and how people suffer and it's just shocking and trying to gain some perspective.
In any event I also understand you can't just flick a switch and feel better just like that and people need time and should be given so much more credit than they' get.It's no easy feat but you as much as anyone else are trying hard and noone realises that as much as you or other's who really know how hard it is.
In reality you deserve so much more and emotions can really take us over but don't forget ever that you're always trying to make a go of it and are doing the best you can and noone can ask more of that.

 

[Stylez]

I don't have friends in florida right now, that's what makes me feel so alone. I had to drop my first class today because the teacher that was meant to teach the class cancelled. So hopefully my English class tomorrow turns out okay. I made an effort to try and sign up for a humanities club at my college. I also might of made a new friend on myspace that can lead to something more. I need friends man....and with bipolar the trust factor always comes in.

Im begging you man what do you mean when you say: "I can see certain values and factors that just stand out about you."

I'm sorry if I'm prying but I'm just clueless on how anyone views me....peace

 

[ace]

I can see by the way you express yourself and even on myspace how talented you're,you may not believe it but I know it's true.You don't have friend's for now in Florida dude but I'll reassure you that you will certainly make some,and I do understand about the trust factor I have Bi Polar also so I do understand how you feel.
I think the key seems to be to try to go as easy on yourself as possible,obviously easier said than done I know I alway's punish myself maybe it's part of the depression I don't know.

 

[Stylez]

The bipolar sides of me

<RAMDOM THOUGHTS START>
Well English turned out to be scary like yesterdays class. I'm scared of new people. Everybody seems so at ease in class, cracking jokes, that everybody laughs at except me cuz I'm so nervous. I wonder why the sign up sheet wasn't passed to me. Was it because of something I said or the way that i looked? This is the same teacher I had last semester, I have to retake his course because I was hospilitilized last semester for 20 days. It's gonna be hard retaking and listening to the same shit for a month and then writing something new about it.

I read some of your threads you started ace and they seem similar to mine in that you want to help people.

My attitude is that I'm such a scared little kid. I take things the wrong way. I just shut down when I get that feeling in my heart. You know the feeling? When somebody says something and its like a bullseye in your heart. I hate that feeling. It's like your heart drops a little bit in your stomach. I think on these forums its called a "trigger."

I have the chances to make friends but I feel that is like an oxymoron. There is no chance to make REAL friends I can trust becasue I hold such a high regard for people who are my friends. If they say something wrong I automatically think their disrespecting me and I don't know how to defend myself. Maybe thats why i dont keep in touch with anybody, friends from HI, to my brother to, well anybody. I always have that thought their talking shit and then revert to being isolated.

That's the wrong attitude to have folks I know. And the attitude is the thing I need to change. Just typing these words helps me realize I can take the chance if I have the balls. Whats the worst that can happen? Smile, be open, and talk.

But in my mind right now I can't talk to people my own age. There's always that lingering silence that behooves every conversation that makes the whole art of conversation awkward. I can't explain myself on sports, clubs, movies, relationships, anything basically. I'm a 5'4 chicken legged kid who cant walk a straight line or balance on one foot. One of a kind easy target for anybody who wants to be an asshole.

But college kids are more mature than that. this isnt high school. WHo gives a fuck what people think.

I know within time I'll get more comfortable in my english class, it was just first day jitters. But why do i always feel vulneralbe. I just feel.....weird.

Just give me the chance, no rather just give me the will to live through the awkward times.<RANDOM THOUGHTS END>

Ace you helped out the wannabe helper man you should feel proud. You're a much stronger person than I am mentally and emotionally. FUck whoever you don't feel comfortable around and tries to fuck with you. When I'm in a manic mood I would defend anyone to the death and that person is you. Don't kill yourself life should never tire you out. Dont give in to anything. This new year is going to be a success because I said it will be.

Hope you well Ace

 

[blub]

Re: The bipolar sides of me

I'm sure you will make some awesme friends on shcool , just be yurself!!! Nothing wrong you're somewhat scared in the beginning, sure it will go better in a few weeks and you will find someone or more to hang out with and who knws maybe they will be yur friends. Anyways wish you all the luck this year and if ya want some crappy advice pm or add me :laugh: [email protected]
Tae care Hun :hug:

 

[ace]

Alienation,Thank's for the kind word's they really struck a cord with me:smile:,first of all you're going to come good and want to know why?because simple in time you'll see you'll make that much progress and you'll conquer everything.Interesting points you raise my dear friend about in class the sign up sheet that wasn't passed to you immediately the thoughts that come to mind aren't I important enough?am I ugly?and the like,but in all respect's these aren't not true at all they're just thoughts that enter our mind that we believe are so true.
Don't worry about anything because you can always talk to me,watch as time goes by moment by moment you'll make friends slowly slowly it may not seem like it now but wait a month.You know what it's like start a new job it's like gees I don't know anyone at a new school the same thing I feel lost alone etc.But as time goes by see how you adapt and you no longer feel like you have to settle in.
Being strong mentally and emotionally well I don't know about that I'm trying I guess and to deal with thing's in a better way even though it is hard,and I understand you so don't feel you're this and that because you're not useless or anything low just in need of a boost of confidence which will happen believe me.
Exactly give you the time and that you will certainly have as much as you need and to work on things,give thing's a chance in which you're so prepared to do and doing that you can't ask for more.just wait in time you will be exactly what you want at the moment try to go easier on yourself really you have to regards always dude Ace.:smile:

 

[ranks1111]

whats up Alienation, this is ranks1111 from Hawaii, or Colorado Springs, or planet Earth. (I think you know that this is the post-poster aka the poster of the posts by now)

I read your posts and I'm rooting for you. It's like I'll always be here in your cheering section b/c I do want you to succeed. And unlike others in this forum, I know you in RL (real life) and have some understanding of your life story, or at least a little moreso than the average person here.

Due to my relocation, I have to make new friends here as well. I've been here 2 weeks and havent met anyone that I can get close with yet, but like others have mentioned, It is a process of getting to know ppl, which can be long and a bit of a drag. Some people do it easier than others, but optimistic attitudes can help.

Realize, that I will do my best to keep in touch although I don't have a home computer.

Thanks to all the forum posters who truly care about my friend, as well as care about others who seek help on this forum. I think it is a valuable resource for people.

Lastly, although you see moving as a catalyst for some of your problems. I want to invite you to come move to Colorado Springs and move-in if you find yourself unable to finish the semester. It's a long ways from where you are but as a true friend, I'd like to extend the offer.

Keep your head up, like Tupac says, right? So glad that you called me the other day, PEACE.

-Ranks1111