why go on

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by whytryanymore, Jul 9, 2010.

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
  1. whytryanymore

    whytryanymore Well-Known Member

    ok so i feel so worthless at the moment i need to come tru for my fammily and cant i had a job but didnt get paid so now they are getting evicted and its all my fault i trully am a worthless piece of shit. so now i will end it all i know my death will bring great suffering but i cant take the constant loss of hope and whatever it is that families are supposed to give. i honestly think i will die tonight. i know we arent supposed to post goodbyes but maybe someone here will gain something from this

    there is a world of oppurtunity out there and its yours for the taking
     
  2. mandyj101

    mandyj101 Well-Known Member

    Hi there..
    Im sure your not worthless :hug:
    You were working in order to give your family a roof over their heads.. a worthless person wouldnt even try.. I know i dont know your exact situation.. but could you prehaps stay with a friend/family member until you find another job? There are charities and organizations out there that can help you and your family.. please reach out and ask for help..
    I hope you heed your own advice 'a world of opportunity out there' and stay around.. Im sure your family would be devistated if they lost you..
    Take care x
     
  3. Marty482

    Marty482 Well-Known Member

    Mandy said some great things. Please listen to her. I am praying for you and hope you do too. You are obviously a great person for trying so valiantly for your family. That is a GREAT person.

    I really BEG you not to do anything tonight or ever. PLEASE STAY with us. You are a very good person that is too hard on yourself. Your family must love you so much and you deserve it. With all your efforts and trying. We need and want you here too. You say that you hope your post helps others so it shows how caring you are. We love you and care and want you to stay.PLEASE PLEASE

    Write me,

    Marty
     
  4. Perfect Melancholy

    Perfect Melancholy SF Friend

    Mandy is spot on with what she wrote, you have so much going on at the moment god I know that feeling it all gets to much and you start to think of the easier way out right? But believe me your family need you, they want you here. Things are hard for everyone at the moment, it is the way the world is. You need to focus on one thing at a time otherwise it can get to much, I know that feeling as well all to well.

    First thing you need to do is fix you, talk to your family friends even people here, and the doctors get some help and support for yourself. Once you are feeling better you can start taking things one step at a time. There are people out there willing to support and help, so please keep fighting.

    Take Care

    Rich
     
  5. whytryanymore

    whytryanymore Well-Known Member

    ok so just to clear things up my family at the moment is just my sister and brother and i just cant go on dissapointing them
     
  6. Marty482

    Marty482 Well-Known Member

    Your family may not be disappointed at all. You are trying thats more than many do. PLEASE come and stay with us. PLEASE tell us the whole story. I think you seem like a great person. PLEASE STAY HERE WITH US. WE care and will help. Your family needs you too. PLEASE WE WANTAND NEED YOU HERE. Lets just start and plan an new life and get things better!!!!


    Write me if you like,

    Marty
     
  7. Dave_N

    Dave_N Banned Member

    If you kill yourself then they will be heartbroken and possibly become depressed and suicidal themselves. Do you really want to be responsible for that? Don't be so hard on yourself man. The economy is really tough right now and those that have a job should consider themselves lucky. Maybe your sister and brother can also help support your family? It shouldn't be only up to you to earn money for your family.
     
  8. whytryanymore

    whytryanymore Well-Known Member

    ugh, it is soo hard continuing on with these convos when i am banished to the garage cuz my sisters boyfriend doesnt like me and for some reason is the only one who sees me for what i am. anyway i guess ill survive for a few more days, i for some reason always do, im so undependable i cant even depend on myself to off myself
     
  9. Concave

    Concave Active Member

    First off your sister's boyfriend sounds like a total dickwad. Of course your family doesn't see you (for what you think you are at the moment... doesn't mean you are remotely what people say you are), cause they are your family. Most families (not gonna lie not all of em) have unconditional love for one another. I've lost a brother 12 years ago, on his bday/ Thanksgiving no less, to suicide. It was related to money problems. A very small amount considering all the heartache my mom, other two brothers, his kids have had to deal with since it happened. My mom still blames herself, and I can see the effects of losing a lost one to suicide this day. Of course I'm not gonna lie though... I have been there w/ a loaded gun in my mouth, but something stopped me. I'm still heavilly depressed, and have definately thought about suicide, but it would destroy my mom, brothers, family, and friends. I know its easy to tunnel vision and see the "easy way out". But please beleive me it will not be easy for your brother and sister. They will have a weight on their shoulders the rest of their life wondering "What if I could have done something". Or try and look at it this way... you off yourself it won't help their financial situation any more. 1st off you won't be able to contribute and money in the future, and they will have to pay for some type of funeral/ creamation or whatever it is will have to be done. Not to mention the state they will be in, so they might have to miss work (if they are working), and it could send them into a downward spiral depression. Please PM me if you want to talk... I guarentee I can relate. Hope I was of some help. Just know there is a way out, even if it seems bleak. Suicide is unreversable, financial problems are not.
     
  10. Daphna

    Daphna Well-Known Member

    I can see how taking the easy way out with death seems appealing, but the truth is that it would be more benificial and productive for you to stay and take care of your family. You will go through trials, and errors I promise you. But the up side is that they will help you grow, learn, and be able to overcome them better the next time. you have so much to live for, and your death would not help anyone. Not in all honesty. No one of the physical plain anyhow, but that is a whole other can of worms. Don't give up, and contiue to grow in faith, and continue to try and try until you get what it is you desire. I suggest prayer, because it always works for me personally, but you are your own person. Please try prayer before completely giving up. I tried life without prayer, and spirituality, and I failed at every turn. Not accusing you of doing the same, just sharing. Once I did look into matters a spiritual way, and was proven that prayer works by doing it, it built up my faith to where I am now, and it is rewarding. I hope this helps. Blessings..
     
  11. Dave_N

    Dave_N Banned Member

    If your sister's boyfriend doesn't like you, tell him to fuck off. Who the hell does he think he is? He doesn't pay the bills and it isn't his house, so he has no right whatsoever to banish you to the garage. All you have to do is pull yourself together and find a job. It doesn't have to be a great job, just something to help pay the bills. Death is never the solution. Suicide only causes your loved ones to become heartbroken and depressed. Please don't give up. :hug:
     
  12. Marty482

    Marty482 Well-Known Member

    We are here for you. Dont be so down on yourself. You seem like a great person. You can always write me if you feel down. I will be a friend . You are in my prayers.
     
  13. whytryanymore

    whytryanymore Well-Known Member

    "Don't give up, and contiue to grow in faith, and continue to try and try until you get what it is you desire. I suggest prayer, because it always works for me personally, but you are your own person. Please try prayer before completely giving up."

    Ok so how can i pray to someone/something that ive denied for all my life and still even though i see it helping my dad soo much just cant seem to do it i feel so fake its like rooting for a team only when they are winning.

    :hamster:
    sry just thought that looked hilarious.

    anywho ive already got it all figgured out of how i would end it all if i do finally grow the balls to do it, which i cant discuss that here so i wont, but it will be an amazing way that nobody will ever look at as suicide so nobody can blame themselves for my death. although so greatly saddened as they feeel they may be, i honestly think they feel they lost me in all but the most phyisical sence last november when i last attempted, well that anyone knew about anway.

    sry to just dissmiss alll the help im not really i just feel like im using you guys/gals, even if i dont use the assistance you have offered. I am verry stubborn i guess is the word i feel like any "help" i recieve must be payed back even if it is emotional support or other types that cant really be payed back. any time i recieve "help" i feel like i am mooching off of ppl which makes me feel worse cuz if ya cant do it for yourself then why the hell are ya here right?
     
  14. Daphna

    Daphna Well-Known Member

    The choice is yours, but I know that there is something better for you once you open your mind, and allow help into your life.Blessings..
     
  15. whytryanymore

    whytryanymore Well-Known Member

    im sorry im so whatever i am i really try to be normal but alas i am who and what i am for however much longer it takes.
     
  16. Marty482

    Marty482 Well-Known Member

    Your fine. Im praying for you. Just dont hurt yourself PLEASE. It hurts o smuch to read those things. Start praying no matter and see what happens. PLEASE. STAY PLEASE Love and hope to you,

    Write me if you like,

    Marty
     
  17. whytryanymore

    whytryanymore Well-Known Member

    so just got some msgs from my girlfriend type thing, guess im a horrible boyfriend cuz i make her think the worst in every situation.
    GREAT
     
Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.