Why I can't.

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by Bubuloo, Sep 17, 2012.

  1. Bubuloo

    Bubuloo New Member

    Dont' get me wrong. I'm sort of happy that I can't.. Do it. Finish it.
    I'm not totally certain of the reason.. I don't think it's because of the fear of pain etc..
    I think it's because i'm Atheist. (I don't want to offend anyone here)
    Now i've often heard of religious people not wanting to commit suicide in fear of going to hell. I don't want to do it because i'll be gone.
    That's it.
    One life..
    It ends, I end.
    So due to that, I don't feel I can die. I want to.. I don't see why I need to be alive.
    But because that's it I can't.
    As selfish and horrible as it sounds I would want to see people suffering after I die, I want people to know that I was loved.
    I want to see that people will care that i'm gone. Because right now, i'm unsure they would.
    Now - As an atheist i'll never know what people think. So what's the point? I'll just carry on life, miserable.. Eventually I may be able to do it.

    Right now though. I can't. I'm sort of glad.. And sort of upset.

    That is all, thanks for reading folks.
  2. NYJmpMaster

    NYJmpMaster Have a question? Message Me Staff Member Forum Owner ADMIN

    It is not an unreasonable thought process - my is similar but rather than wanting to see people suffer I want to see what some of the people I care for do and how things turn out for them, but I too believe gone is gone and no satisfaction or feeling of peace or relief or anything of the sort awaits.
    The carrying on with a miserable life is very often more choice than circumstance- if you were to share some of those issues maybe there would be useful insight to try to change that?

    Take Care