Dont' get me wrong. I'm sort of happy that I can't.. Do it. Finish it. I'm not totally certain of the reason.. I don't think it's because of the fear of pain etc.. I think it's because i'm Atheist. (I don't want to offend anyone here) Now i've often heard of religious people not wanting to commit suicide in fear of going to hell. I don't want to do it because i'll be gone. That's it. One life.. It ends, I end. So due to that, I don't feel I can die. I want to.. I don't see why I need to be alive. But because that's it I can't. As selfish and horrible as it sounds I would want to see people suffering after I die, I want people to know that I was loved. I want to see that people will care that i'm gone. Because right now, i'm unsure they would. Now - As an atheist i'll never know what people think. So what's the point? I'll just carry on life, miserable.. Eventually I may be able to do it. Right now though. I can't. I'm sort of glad.. And sort of upset. That is all, thanks for reading folks.