Why is he doing this?

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by point-less, Apr 13, 2011.

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  1. point-less

    point-less Well-Known Member

    It's probably obvious that I'm a sensitive girl and one thing really got to me today. I've being going out with my boyfriend for about 2 years now; something like that. Anyway I love him so much, he is the love of my life and I'm forever thinking about him, always needing him to hold me, always needing to know he's okay, always missing him. He is my life, my everything but, lately, we've grown apart a tiny bit.
    He never really talks to me anymore, apart from when he misses me or something, and the only time I get a reply it's always to do with sex e.g.
    Me: Hey :)
    Him: Sex
    Me: Lol you okay?
    Him: Sex
    That's pretty much all I get. I feel so special and grateful when I get something more, when I can actually talk to him about something other than sex.
    Also, he says I'm the love of his life and I'm his everything and I'm not criticizing him, he does show that he loves me, he is so loving and caring. But he sometimes flirts with my mates and tries to get the to have sex with him or he goes to clubs and has sex or gets off with girls there. It's starting to break my heart a bit. But, I don't want to tell him; if I leave it too long he will think I'm okay with it and then eventually I will crack and go crazy (happens with everything I bury at the back of my head) but at the same time, it's what makes him happy, it's who he is and I can't take that away from him. I would rather suffer for him to be happy but it's hurting so much.
    I don't know what to do. :'(
     
  2. In Limbo

    In Limbo Forum Buddy

    You cannot suffer for him to be happy, because you cannot enjoy his happiness in your current state.

    You need to tell him as much as you can - if he is a caring person, then he'll at least realise how you feel and the two of you can move forward...
     
  3. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Hun you need to tell him how hurt you are okay when he does these things He is not thinking about you at all he is only thinking of himself I wish you could move on and find someone that truly deserves your love hugs
     
  4. point-less

    point-less Well-Known Member

    That's just it though, I love him with all my heart, he is my everything and if I didn't have him I would just fall apart. I just want him to be happy and not think I'm trying to control him :/
     
  5. In Limbo

    In Limbo Forum Buddy

    It's not you controlling him...it's you regaining self-control
     
  6. point-less

    point-less Well-Known Member

    I just don't have the guts to :/
     
  7. Flying Fox

    Flying Fox Well-Known Member

    From my own experiences with friends (not boyfriends), it will get harder the longer you leave it to tell him. Sooner is better than later, the anxiety you my feel when you think about telling him will build up and cause the snowball effect. As your partner, it is not really respectful of him if he tries/has sex with other, and if it continues he may think that you don't mind and get into the habit.
    By no means I am an authority on this, as I have yet to have a boyfriend, so take this with a grain of salt. Even so, I hope it helps and that you find a solution.
     
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