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why is it so hard...

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by crookxshanks, Dec 29, 2008.

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  1. crookxshanks

    crookxshanks Well-Known Member

    ... to fight these horrible suicidal urges i have in my head

    i can see myself doing it even though i dont have the courage in me to hurt all the people around me. its just that when the urges get bad i just cant help but think that all the people i care about dont deserve me in their life. that they deserve so much better. i cant win against my past anymore and its dragging me down however much i dont want it to

    trying so hard to fight but just feel like fighting losing battle :cry:
  2. Acy

    Acy Mama Bear - TLC, Common Sense Staff Member Safety & Support


    I'm sorry you're struggling so hard. :hug:

    Remember that depression brings out our most negative feelings about life and ourselves. All the people who care for you choose to care for you and have you in their lives. They are choosing you without the fog of depression influencing their opinions of you.

    We can all start over any time. You can move on from your past even though you cannot change it.

    Please take care and don't give in to the impulses you're feeling. Stay safe. :hug:
  3. Locket

    Locket Well-Known Member

    i know it's hard mand but we are here together :hug::hug:
    it's a good thing that you don't want to hurt the people around you, as it would, you know it would :heart: you're loved by lots of people (including me) okay :smile:
    times like this are inevitable for some, but there are good times
    the bad does go away and clear for good things! :heart: (more in pm) xxx
  4. mourningseraph

    mourningseraph Well-Known Member

    I just woke up right now and found your post. :cry: Just try and take it one day at a time sweetie. :hug: I know how hard it is, I feel the same way. Take care of yourself today. Take a nap or snuggle up with a cozy blanket and some tea and read a good book... do something little for yourself today. That might help make things a little easier. I'm going to PM you right now.
  5. Nicki

    Nicki Active Member

    I'm really sorry that you are finding it hard at the moment..Remember that the people around you love you very much,,you may feel alone and think that they are better without you but they wont be....I'm here most days pm me anytime.:cuddle2:
  6. andyc68

    andyc68 Guest

    sorry to hear you are feeling like this

    there are many people here who are willing to support you

    listen to Acy's wise words in the post above
  7. Leiaha

    Leiaha Well-Known Member

    I haven't spoken to you before, so.... Hi, my name is lea :).
    I am always sad to hear other people feel as bad as i do :( i'm really sorry.
    The only things i can suggest are taking things through with one trusted friend.
    Listening to happy music, not beating yourself up over the feelings you cant help.
    Give yourself a pampering session! :)
    Sorry i cant be of more help :(
    I hope you feel better soon :)
    Take care and stay safe,
    Lea :cheekkiss:
  8. crookxshanks

    crookxshanks Well-Known Member

    thank you to everyone for your kind words
    trying to get through this but shakey and scared of myself
    i wish that i was stronger :(
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