Why is life like this?

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by MistyMaisy, Nov 22, 2010.

  1. MistyMaisy

    MistyMaisy Well-Known Member

    This is a rant, mainly. And I'm really mad, so I'm going to tone it down a bit while writing... Starting! Directed at my friend, R. If you told me what you think I should do many times before and I haven't before, do you think it's what I wanna do? I don't care what you think right now, sorry, but I'm too pissed.
    And now, my rant. To begin with, I get bad grades at school. I'm an A student! I get A's on ALL my tests, so how'd I end up with three C's and a D?! It's just not ME. I think they're entering it wrong, crappy school. <_< And next, if you've read my other topics, my parents are being bitchy to me because I love a guy they don't approve of and did stuff my dad AND my sister did at that age. But no, it's okay for them! But not me. WHY. <_<; And then, we get a dog. I'm not mean, but she's a pain in the backside. I babysit her, ALWAYS. And my mom's spending all our family's money so.. We have nothing left. It wouldn't be as bad if we weren't "good" in the bank with my Grandparents, but WE're not, so she should calm down. >.< Next, I've been staying after school doing tutoring stuff and sure, I've been seeing the guy I mentioned earlier, because yeah, I wanna talk to him and that's the only way I can seeing as he's banned from contacting me (what my parents think). They banned me being with him forever, but I don't give two sh*ts what they think, it's my life. And today, they said they're going to my school to see if I actually HAVE been doing after school tutoring. They don't believe me. They should give me some f*cking air to breathe, I'm considering self harm. They don't take me to the doctors even when the guy (again, from mentioning earlier) told them I needed to go, because I wasn't feeling "happy." But shit, do they. "NO, YOU FEEL GREAT, NO DOCTORS FOR YOU!" yet she goes every f*cking week! Why can't I? I need it more than HER.
    She made the guy go to the doctors because he was cutting, and he doesn't even have fu*king depression! Maybe I need to start cutting to prove to her I need to go to the doctors too, but she'd probably just ban me from everything and lock me in my room.
    -End of rant for now- That wasn't all of it, but enough for now.
    ._.;
     
  2. MiraWolf95

    MiraWolf95 Account Closed

    What the heck, you got those kinds of grades!? You're friggen' smart! Smarter than me. I think our school's system is jinxed this year. Something just isn't right, I been feeling deja vu all year. But anyways, DON'T CUT. That only causes more problems. Remember that scar on my arm and how it got there? Did that make anything better? Nope. Only caused more problems actually. So no cutting missy D:. I don't really know what to say about how your parents are being though, except that 'protective' is in overdrive at the moment lol. :l
     
  3. MistyMaisy

    MistyMaisy Well-Known Member

    But at least they'd notice and (maybe) get me some help. D: And protective, a bit too much I think. :< I know they're my parents and are meant to protect me but it's doing nothing but making me worse. And heck if they notice. I think part of the reason I'm getting those grades is because of the way they're putting all this on me. And if they ask the school about what I've been doing after school like they said they would, they'll ban me from everything (like before they said they'd send me to England to a prison-school thing) fo sho. And didn't that cut on your arm make you feel better, just a little? Like the blood pooling out was relieving the pressure and the weights?... Maybe I need help.. xD;; But at least I'm not at the stage of trying to commit murder I guess. :/
     
  4. aoeu

    aoeu Well-Known Member

    You should keep all your tests and assignments and record all your grades to compare against the teacher's marks. If there is a discrepancy you can prove it that way. Talk to your teachers as it is to see if there may have been an error... though honestly it seems unlikely there was that much error in 4 separate classes :\ Are you doing well at the non-test aspect of your classes?

    (Can't help with anything else...)
     
  5. MiraWolf95

    MiraWolf95 Account Closed

    Oh goodness no. I'm terrified of blood so I didn't cut 'the normal way' lol. I cut on top of my arm nearly to the bone so all I really saw was a tad bit of blood and arm meat >_>. That made me feel worse actually. But anyways.. You don't deserve all that harsh treatment you're getting. I've known you since 8th grade and even thats long enough to say you don't deserve what you're going through :l. They're people far worse in this world doing far worser things, for example, some of the shit I hear around our school. Makes me think in my head "why is my best friend going through stuff while these other far worse people are waltzing around with all freedom to do whatever?". I'm sorry I'm not much help, you know I suck at advice and this kind of stuff. But I was just giving my opinion.

    By the way, do what aoeu mentioned about school.
     
  6. MistyMaisy

    MistyMaisy Well-Known Member

    aoeu, yeah I think I'll start.. But it does seem unlikely like you said. :/
    And Mira, yeah, those people at school have parents that are proud. Makes me sick. My mom just told me to walk the dog so when I tried to put her lead on, she kept squirming so I tried to hold her against the wall a minute while I put it on, and my mom said "What the HELL are you doing?! Maybe someone should hold YOU against the flaming wall!!" and gave me a really dirty look and threw the dog's lead at me. I was nearly crying while walking the dog.
    Another thing that upsets me is that they don't respect what I want to do with my life. I say "I want to go to Japan!" "Learn fking Spanish. We're not going to Japan but we will go to Spain." I want to grow up and live in Japan, teaching English as a career. Why can't they just respect that? They're parents, they're meant to be supportive in what choices I make.
    -yep, more of a rant-
    :/
     
  7. MiraWolf95

    MiraWolf95 Account Closed

    Dang. That made me kinda mad just now. I'm sorry to get mean sounding to other people in our school, but we have fckin' pregnant sluts walking around with freedom and you're getting this treatment!? :l. By the way, do what you want to do in life no matter what anybody tells you. You wanna go to Japan and teach English there, then do it. Theres nothing nobody can do about it when you're 18. Its your life, your goals. They should be happy that you even have goals.
     
  8. MistyMaisy

    MistyMaisy Well-Known Member

    I know what you mean. The girls at school that are always like "I'MMA GOLD DIGGER! GIMME UR ****!" And it's just like, what. But with my parents, it's a trouble trying to learn it if they shout at me every time I mention Japanese. And me being 18 is four years away. I dunno if I'd survive another four years. x_x But hopefully, they'll give me a bit of freedom when I start driving.. Ever wish you got born into a different family? o3o
     
  9. MiraWolf95

    MiraWolf95 Account Closed

    Nope, not at all. I love my family. Still, don't let them discourage you. Perhaps not bring it up that much to them so they wont discourage you about it? You will make it by the way. :)
     
  10. aoeu

    aoeu Well-Known Member

    The great thing about being an adult is that you can go to Japan regardless of what anyone (well, except the government, but they're usually reasonable) says.

    I wish I were born BY a different family, my genetics suck pretty hard, though I don't mind the one that raised me too much now that I've moved out (intolerable while I lived in, though.)
     
  11. MistyMaisy

    MistyMaisy Well-Known Member

    Mira: Thanks.. :3 It is discouraging though because I feel like I'm getting no where if I can't talk it and about it. o3o
    aoeu: Yeah I see what you mean. o: I guess my genetics suck too P: My mom is not that bright and my dad made D's... D: But I seem to be making it by. How'd you cope with living with them? :/ I need help or someway to control my anger more than smashing my computer when it doesn't automatically have a good Internet connection.... x.x
     
  12. Zander

    Zander Member

    it will be ok though not long to go 4 years and then no more parents that treat you bad and you can work through it i know it may seem hard at the moment but it will get better
     
  13. aoeu

    aoeu Well-Known Member

    You just sort of have to go with it. Fix what you have control over, and try your hardest to ignore the rest. Find some other excuse to see a doctor if they won't let you go for depression. Work on your grades however you need to.
     
  14. MistyMaisy

    MistyMaisy Well-Known Member

    Yeah I guess. :/ My parent's won't let me go to the doctors for nothing though, even if I've got an infection. My mom gives me fish pills that aren't for humans but she gives me them anyways.. o.o And I plan on working on my grades a whole lot. X3 Thanks~