Life is kicking my ass and I don't know how much more of this I can handle..., let me tell you why. I am 22 and currently not in school this semester and not employed. I got fired from my job I've had for 4 years two weeks ago. It happened because of two reasons. I was late that morning and I walked out in the afternoon because I caught my manager lying about letting one of the other guys leave early, he was trying to screw me over into staying and doing HIS job. So I walked out because I technically got OFF work at that time and had been there 9 hours already. But because of a new rule that went into effect THAT DAY, I wasn't supposed to leave until both of our jobs were done because we now work in teams and the other guy was on MY team, but my manager let him go early! He told me I didn't work as hard as him, but I spent the morning doing somebody else's job because he didn't do it to try and screw over some of the other people I worked with (none of which were actually there that day). So I went to pick up my check the next day and was fired. I got mad and started cussing out my boss, manager and everyone else. And in trying to defend myself I wound up ratting out some of my co-worker friends, they had broken and stolen some stuff, and now they're not my friends anymore. I had been playing guitar and one of my co-workers was going to be in a band with me, but now that won't happen because they all hate me. All the friends I had left in the world. ... my oldest and best friend is now married and in the marines so I never see him anymore and he even doesn't call me like he used to, so now I feel even more alone. I've been trying to get a job, but my references are fucked over now and nobody will hire me. I have $14 left to my name. I still live with my parents so it's not SO bad I guess, but I'm 22 and STILL LIVE WITH MY PARENTS. I didn't go to school this semester because I'm out of core classes to take and I still have NO IDEA what it is in this world I want to do or could do. I have tried and tried and tried but no matter what I cannot get a girlfriend. I have never had one. I once thought this one girl liked me and I was crazy about her, but when I told her how I felt she didn't care, she even went as far as to say we were never friends, just acquiescences, even though we ate together every day at lunch. ... As I sit here at 3:30 in the afternoon, I realize I have absolutely no purpose anymore in life. No job, no girl, no friends, no life. I stay up until 3 am watching stupid crap on TV and wake up at 1pm in the afternoon... because I have nowhere to be, no one to talk to and nowhere to go. I hate it and I want everything to change. I WANT a girlfriend, I WANT a job-nay, a career. But it seems like no matter how hard I try to get this stuff, it just doesn't come. I refuse to be some 30 year old loser who has no life living with his parents. And if things don't get better soon... well, I have a fear of going to hell if I kill myself... so what I may do is just take incredibly stupid risks, not caring if they kill me until one of them finally does. I don't know if that would count as suicide or not, but the truth is I don't really want to die. I want things to get better. But it seems that they just do not want to. Do you know how many times I got on my knees and prayed for things to get better? I'm still going nowhere. I don't know what to do anymore.