Why keep on living when there is nothing left to live for?

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by lora410, Nov 29, 2010.

  1. lora410

    lora410 New Member

    My name . . . or nickname anyways, is Libby.

    I am thirteen years old.

    I have one mom and two dads. the first dad is ALWAYS gone! Never home! He always tries to buy my love. As if he needs it. . . my mom is going back to school and smokes, and as far as I know she's done drugs one too many times. She doesnt abuse me or anything. I just hate her guts. She doesn;t understand me at all!!!! WTF is her problem?! Shes always saying she's here for me . . but how? You never wanna talk to me, and you leave me home alone every day. My other dad, is basically meantal. He has no control over his anger. I love him. He NEVER flips out at me. And he loves me. but thanks to his bottled up emotions, I CAN NEVER SEE HIM AGAIN!!!!! He let all his anger out on his sisters husband . . and it didnt end well. Now who's gonna be there for me?

    I've never been popular. Never had any good friends. I guess im not worth it. I only have . . what? Three friends? And I think 2 outa 3 of them would care if I was gone. I feel so lost in life. :lost:

    I've never really attempted suicide, but i've been trying to convince myself to. For some reason I just don't want to hang on anymore.

    I write stories . . . im good at that . . well kind of. I dont know why i said that, its not like my depressing stories effect anything.

    To be honest, I probly WONT kill myself, i'll just end up alone, poor, and scard for life. I guess I do need help getting over it. But whats the use? who could help me now? I have practically nobody. :badday: :bash:

    And please dont comment on my spelling or how stupid this sounds. It's not worth it. Im in enough pain already.

    Random Facts:
    -My grandpa died of cancer
    -My bestfriends Dumped me
    -popular chicks look at me with disgusted faces
    -Why am I so ugly? I mean, it's not my fault.
    -I want to die, but can't . . . .
  2. In Limbo

    In Limbo Forum Buddy

    First things first. You are trying to convince yourself to die. That means that most of you wants to live. Hold on to that fact.

    Is there anybody at school or within your family you can talk to? Have you spoken to your doctor about it? There are ways out, hold on in there - you're only 13 and that means you've got so much time to turn things around. You mention writing stories. Have you thought about putting your feelings down on paper for your parents to read? That might give some insight for them into how you feel and how to help you?

    My PM box is always open,
    Much love