why on earth do i do this to myself?. i'm entirely to blame!. ****trigger****

so anyway, not sure if i told you about this.... but earlier in the week i told 1 of my colledge tutors that i would not be back next year- and i was wanting to try and comit suicide again before i even had a chance to leave colledge. in other words, i wanted to do it at the colledge and never look back....

anyway, my parents rang me today and asked me " your tutor just aranged a meeting, do you know what's it about...?"

anyway- i told them it was to talk about a certain person at the colledge, nothing to do with me what so ever.

you see, apart from the tutor in question- no one else knew of my plans.

they asked me if it was anything bad and i told them... oh no, you've nothing to worry about.

anyway- they said something along the lines of.. hmm, i wonder why she wanted a meeting so bad?

and then they hung up..

they are going to try and contact the tutor in question tomorrow, and take it from their. if they ever find out what my plans were, who knows what could happen... i really don't know whether i should just call back and confess everything (even though it is hard). what you've got to remember is, they were never their for me.. so why do i tell them anything?. or do i wait with baited breath to see the reactions and watch it all unfold.

i'm a lier and a cheat- feel so ashamed right now.

thanks for reading..

 

I'm sorry to say that i've been in almost the exact same situation. And I'd advise that you do the opposite to what I did, and tell your parents.

When they find out, whether they were there for you or not, they are very likely to be be very upset and confused, so it's best they hear it from you. Also that way, they won't be so angry at you for lying. Just think about how you would feel if you were your mum. Would you want to find out second hand? Or by your own daughter? I think i'd much prefer it first hand. But of course it's your choice.

Best of luck either way. You can get through this

 

Hun you do what is best for you at this point okay maybe if youtell your parents whats up do you think they will show at the college if you stay quiet the may show and then you will have the support of your tutor there to back you up either way it is important that they hear it I hope y ou get all the support you deserve hun Try to stay in school okay take a lighter work load but finish your education as it will always be something that will help youin the future hugs

 

i will let you know how it goes

hugs..

 

from my personal experience , i t is best to tell ur parent now ,
they will get even more upset when a stranger tell them what they dot know about their babe was in desperation to kill themself
anyway , hope it went alright ,
tell me how it go xx

 

Hey, hope everything went well. I'm thinking of you.