I have been curious about why some people can cope better than others with depression and negative feelings. Whenever I get in a fight with my wife, I want to crawl into a hole and die. I pray that I won't wake up the next day. But I don't think most people think this way. Most people have a strong drive to live. I don't. Why don't others have such negative feelings about themselves? Here is what I have come up with. I feel like the more support pillars a person has in life, the more reason they have to live. For example, if we have Person #1 with the following life: 1) Happily married 2) Children who look up to him 3) Successful job that enables his family to be financially secure 4) Good relationship with parents, siblings, cousins, family 5) Volunteers his time to a charity or helps other people in some way 6) Strong network of friends from high school, college, professional career, etc 7) In good health And contrast that to Person #2 (i.e. me) who: 1) Wife is angry at him 2) No kids 3) Just started a small business, and I spend all my time struggling to keep it afloat 4) Terrible relationship with my family members 5) No charity activities, I don't really help anyone or touch anyone's lives through volunteering or mentoring. 6) I only have one close friend who actually makes an attempt to keep in touch with me. Everyone else has slowly disappeared when once they have kids - that's how it is when you enter your 30s and are a solo entrepreneur 7) Recently diagnosed with an autoimmune disease In an objective sense, what reason does Person #2 have to live? Not much reason, if you ask me. No pillars of support. Add that to the feelings of inadequacy and inferiority ever since I was a kid, and it's no wonder that I'm depressed and think about suicide all the time. If my wife is happy and we are doing ok, then with 1 support pillar, I feel ok. Not great, but at least ok. But when she gets angry and that support pillar is gone, then there's nothing holding me up. A healthy person with 7 support pillars or more can withstand one or more of the pillars collapsing because he still has the others to hold him up. If I can make it alive through the next few years, I just want to make enough money to keep my wife happy. Then at least I feel like I will have accomplished something. Another option is to take out a life insurance policy so at least she can benefit if I die. So I guess the obvious conclusion is to support yourself with as many pillars as you can so you can keep yourself happy and give yourself the drive to keep living every day!