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Why won't they leave me alone?

may71

Well-Known Member
#21
Yes the reason is because of my panic attacks. Just thinking about my past experiences sends me into hell
I wonder if you could write something down for the doctor saying that you are feeling suicidal, have anxiety and panic attacks, and are addicted, and that you can talk about symptoms and how long you've had them, but you don't want to talk about past experiences.

I've kept my post very pg13 with what lil I've shared with you guys. Ive only told you guys the not so bad stuff so far
I'm sorry to hear that, the pg13 version sounds terrible enough as it is.

Does acupuncture really work?
It's been endorsed by the World Health Organization for treating a variety of conditions. Depression, anxiety, and opioid addiction are all on the list
https://www.evidencebasedacupuncture.org/who-official-position/

Western studies in the past several years indicate the following:

Dopplar ultrasound shows that acupuncture increases circulation & blood flow in treated areas.
Thermal imaging shows it decreases inflammation.
Neuroimaging studies suggest it calms areas of the brain that register pain and activates those involved in rest and recuperation.

The reasons why acupuncture works are not well understood, but the important thing to know is that acupuncture can help people to quit opioids and can treat depression and anxiety.

The links in my signature have some more info

Here's some info on finding affordable treatments

Community clinics

You get acupuncture usually in a group setting, typically costs about $20 US

Clinics can be found by searching for "community acupuncture clinics in [your area]"
or
www.POCAcoop.com has listings for commmunity clinics, mostly in the US, 3 in Canada, 1 in Isreal, 1 in Spain
www.acmac.net has listing mostly in the UK, 1 in Germany

Teaching Clinics

You get treated by a student (usually) under the supervision of a teacher or licensed acupuncturist (always). Treatments are in a private treatment room (usually). Prices range from zero to $50 per treatment.

Teaching clinics can be found by searching for "acupuncture schools in [your area]" and then finding the clinic link or info on a school's homepage.
 
#22
I hear resilience and strength in you. Lean on your wife. I imagine you are wanting to protect her from your past. I am betting she is stronger than you think. Don’t push her out. You are an absolute overcomer! You can do this! Keep pushing forward in life and claim the life you deserve.
 
#23
I hear resilience and strength in you. Lean on your wife. I imagine you are wanting to protect her from your past. I am betting she is stronger than you think. Don’t push her out. You are an absolute overcomer! You can do this! Keep pushing forward in life and claim the life you deserve.
Thanks for your support. Truth is, I'm on the edge and ready to jump. I've tried commiting suicide twice since I last posted here. Failed attempts. I'm just a fuk up who deserves what he gets. My wife would be ten times better without me around.
 

may71

Well-Known Member
#24
I'm just a fuk up who deserves what he gets
That's not true.

You're a man who's survived a lot of horrific abuse and trauma. Things can probably get better for you, but you need to get some treatment and support to get there.

My wife would be ten times better without me around
If she loves you even a little bit, she'd probably be devastated.

Maybe you could try telling her about your drug use, that you're feeling suicidal, and some of the reasons why you feel this way. If knowing the truth leads her to leave, you don't have anything to lose, since you're planning to leave her through suicide anyway.

If you tell her the truth and she leaves, you're freeing her from you.

You may be underestimating the chances that she really does love you. In which case, there's nothing worse that you could do to her than to kill yourself. Give her a chance to really love you by telling her what's really going on.
 

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