I had my life in order had two good frinds was working on my masters had a committed relacionship but then one of my frinds killed himself my wife sliped into what ill call a coma to savw time typing so I had to drop all my classis so I got straight f for this semester witch means no more school and now my gf is acting like she is 3 diferint people. so now I am hevely ingaging in self harm again and am home less siting behind a mc donalds on my cell phone waiting for it to die. why do I even boughter trying to fight any longer why is it that every time I I think I am gping to be ok gvery thing gos down the tolit? what is the point in living if you will never know happiness? I mean I cant even sleep anymore because I am home less and my clouth is staned I am afread a cop may find me and lock me up. what am I soupose to do why cant I just live? am I relly the mounster that people fear in the dark? am I such a waste that I don't deserve some wear to lay my head? whay can I not chang this?