why?

[bloodysunday]

Why now?

Why do this to me?

Why now?

I was settled, I was comfortable

Now I want to finish this vodka munch all these pills and say "fuck off you bastards. I hate you all"

Instead, I will scream

AAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH:cry::cry::cry::cry::cry::cry:

 

[Terry]

What happened:ohmy:

 

[bloodysunday]

Everything!

 

[Terry]

Have had a fair few times like that hun :hug:

 

[The_Discarded]

:sad: Damn. I hear ya. 'Everything' sucks...


(Here if you need to talk. :hug: )

 

[bloodysunday]

I am tired of the "fair few times" being every friggin day. I am fed up of the blame always falling on my shoulders. I am tired of having to be the "strong one" that everyone turns to. Everyone expects me to have the answers, everyone expects me to cope.. Just because.

Well to hell with it. I AM NOT COPING

 

[Terry]

Then tell em. Been in exactly the same situation (over and over again actually:blink finally they broke the camels back with one too many straws and I let it all out. The result was amazing..everyone got off my back.
Didn't like the shocked looks overly much tho :sad:

 

[bloodysunday]

If I was to do that, the family would crumble. I love um too much to do that to um

 

[The_Discarded]

I'm sorry it's like that.

I know how tough it is. It's suffocating, exhausting, just all-around terrible to have everyone leaning on you.

>.< But you'll have to do something.

If you keep it all in you'll hurt 'em in the long run anyway.

And you can't be all there for them when you're feeling this overwhelmed yourself. Can you just let them know, ever-so-subtly, that you're not dealing well?

Many :hug:s to you.

 

[bloodysunday]

Nope. It aint just that. Tat is merely the tip of the iceburgh. What lies beneth is far far worse

 

[bloodysunday]

Sorry, *that


Besides, I feel weak now. eyes struggling. Boby numb.

 

[The_Discarded]

damn, i feel your pain...

will sleep help any? and if so, can you? i know sleep's no where near the cure of the earth, but sometimes it's pretty helpful.

 

[bloodysunday]

That didn't work, the vodka, the pills. I'm still fuckin here

AAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!

 

[Terry]

Good :hug:

 

[bloodysunday]

it is NOT good ! !

 

[Terry]

Yes it is...cos THIS WILL PASS....send me pm if you need to talk :hug:

 

[bloodysunday]

When is it going to pass Einstein?

This has been getting steadily worse for the last 16 years. I see nothing changing. Only it getting worse

So I know you are wrong

 

[bloodysunday]

What the hell did I do?

Why do you treat me this way?

I gave you all of me

My body grows weak. I am dying inside slowly.