This is a 'welcome to my life' situation... relationships and I are disasterous for all concerned. I hurt them, they hurt me and it always ends in disaster. I have decided not to do relationships any more til I'm sorted out, it just isn't worth it! So I have no advice I'm afraid...!
Based on my own experiences and the wisdom my elders share with me it is impossible to have a relationship in which you never get hurt or hurt the other. The key I think is to learn to forgive ourselves and learn from our mistakes. Sometimes punishing ourselves is the worst thing we can do. It makes us feel worse and it doesn't address the problem at all. In fact I've found we tend to repeat things if we don't address them. So don't beat yourself up. You are only human and no doubt going through a lot yourself. Just remember it's alright to make mistakes. That's how we learn and grow and we make them every day for our entire lives. :hug:
Point is, do you love the girl who loves you in the same way?? If not, it's not fair to use her to hedge your bets cos neither of you will ever truly be happy (relationship advice from the relationship Titanic... :blink: :WTF