Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by starryeyed, Apr 26, 2011.

  1. starryeyed

    starryeyed Well-Known Member

    Why have I been abused all my life ? why has no one ever cared about me
    i have been raped and beaten so many times.i have no friends ,no one speaks to me ,im ignored by my family
    my sister screams at me to kill myself .i think everyone is waiting for me to kill myself
    no one ver asks me how i am how im doing
    im invisible ,im nothing
    no one could take this day after day
  2. Terry

    Terry Antiquities Friend Staff Alumni

    Good God! what a vile sister :mad:
    Have you tried asking her why she feels the need to be such a prize bitch?
    Have you had any counselling/therapy to help you come to terms with the rape and abuse?
    No wonder you're depressed, thats a heavy load to carry.
    Stay with us and let us help lighten it, here you will always have an ear.
  3. wheresmysheep

    wheresmysheep Staff Alumni

    hey, I've read yoru other posts, and I made this reply for you;

    Your in ireland, I would suggest going to the Rape crisis centre near you http://www.rcni.ie/home-1.aspx , in extreme cases like this, they interveen almost instantly, they can help with nearly every aspect your having issues with; the gaurds being assholes as they always are, your housing situation (as in they'll point you in teh right direction), as for money, i dont know if you have a job, but you said its a small income, i'm sure your most likely eligable for council housing. your relief officer, if you explain the situation vaguely, they shuold move you up the list fairly quickly. They seem horrible, but they do care, you could also get yoru psych/gp to help move you up the list, with letters explaining taht you need this.

    Look drop me a PM, I want to help you, and I'm not fully extent in everything, but I will help you as much as possible. I want to get you better.
  4. starryeyed

    starryeyed Well-Known Member

    Thanks .I have got letters off my psych gp and the social worker and sent them to the council and I have been on the list 5 years and still nothing.I even sent an email stating my situation saying I know people with two cars outside their door with council houses and their partners who are working living with them and Im being abused and still nothing.
    My sister is a drunk ,she has beat me up in public ,she has beat holes in my door which I have to lock to keep her out.She screams abuse at me 24 7.Telling me to go back to hospital ,thats where I belong.Its been 5 years since I was in hospital and she brings it up nearly evey day .She says shes drinking becos of me ? I dont know what she means ,she also says she hates the sight of me.She got something at the gps the other day and spent ages screaming at me after saying she should have let me be in pain ,that I didnt deserve help.My parents see nothing wrong with her .
    As for the rape it happened years ago ,both incidents .I have told the doctors Im being beaten yet they pretend like I havent spoken.
    I was abused verbally by a psych nurse and by the guards ,the two people I went to for help.
    My parents ignore me or shout abuse at me .That Im nothing .That I dont deserve to be spoken to .My father completely ignores me ,unlesss I ask him a question which I have to repeat three times and hes not hard of hearing either before some wiseguy says this.
    Im chronicaly ill and cant work .The doctors arent helping.Im at my wits end.
  5. wheresmysheep

    wheresmysheep Staff Alumni

    it doesnt matter if it was years ago, you can still go to the crisis centre.
    I understand your hurt and upset, but its probably not a good idea to be agressive about it.
    with relation to rehousing, i wouldnt post the letters, hand them to yoru relief officer directly. Your age should also go for you in getting a rehoused.
    Otherwise, what about rent allowance? which benifit are you currently on? that could help me help you further.
    What county are you in? can help you get tempory housing, help, counselling.
  6. starryeyed

    starryeyed Well-Known Member

    Where in my post did I say I was agressive ? Im an abuse victim ,im afraid to even speak.
    What is a relief officer ,those letters were sent by the social worker last year .
    I dont see a future for myself .Theres something going on ,things arent right.Its not normal for everyone to ignore me ,everyone .
    Im on da Im chronically ill.
  7. wheresmysheep

    wheresmysheep Staff Alumni

    Agressive in your way of handling doctors and teh welfare, its just how i read it i could have been wrong.
    Relief officer is the person who deals with welfare payments and rehousing. You said your 34? So, you would be easily rehomed if yoru still at home.
    If I knew what area you were in (you can PM me it so no one can trace you if your worried about that) I could help you get to your relief officer and where your best welfare team would be. I have lived and dealt with both rural welfare teams and city welfare teams. I want to help you.
    I'm not ignoring you, I want to help you.
    I have am in teh process of getting DA, my gp and psych nurse told me to go on it, so i am waiting for teh payment to come through.
    the welfare office you went to to get the forms, and hand them in, ask them where your local relief officer is, then ask for an appointment. when your going for your appointment, bring copies of the letters you got off your GP and social worker, stating you need to be rehomed, and it will all happen alot quicker for you.
    untill then, do you have a counsellor? someone safe for you to talk to?
    Also, if i knew your area, i could help direct you to hostels. We do have them in this country.
    I understadn your sick, which is why I am pushing the rehoming first. not a hostel. but you sound so hurt, and its understandable.
    I'm not ignoring you, i want to help
  8. starryeyed

    starryeyed Well-Known Member

    I didnt mean you were ignoring me.i meant othrs.i dont have those letterd.the doc and the social worker sent them.
  9. wheresmysheep

    wheresmysheep Staff Alumni

    Well ask them to write you up another letter for you to get out of where your livnig, cause frankly it sounds awful what your going through
  10. starryeyed

    starryeyed Well-Known Member

    yeah the social worker is a bit of a joke ,she told me last year she had sent those letters .Then it turned out she hadnt .
    I have basically had do everything myself .
  11. icequeen

    icequeen Well-Known Member

    starryeyed, i am so sad that you are having to wait so long to get out of your immediate environment and can understand that it wont help you in anyway. as for your sister, well she is a prize cattle (thats being nice) and as i understand it your parents are no better. maybe your sister is jealous and maybe sees driving you to edge as a way of getting more attention herself. parents are weird, sometimes if they ignore a situation they hope it will go away as they dont know how to deal with it.

    wheresmysheep has done a great job trying to support you through experience. i cant offer that i am afraid, but just wanted to let you know that here you are not ignored.

    what part of the world do you live? maybe others can advise on housing etc. 5 years is one hell of long time to wait in your circumstances, and its wrong that you have to keep chasing people up, but unfortunately its a common problem..i never hold my breathwhen someone says they are going to do something as for the most part they dont and that itself wont help your emotions.

    let us help here if we can. you are not alone :hug: