Why must I feel? This Pain, the Hurt, the Sadness, Stupidity and Shame are overwhelming. Why feel when the result of doing so results in an internal massacre of thoughts? Why do I try? The results are causing only more harm, more frustration and more idiotic actions by self and others. This afternoon I am struggling and smothering, almost overpowered. Why breath? I'm not sure. Why did I go from heaven to hell in this one day?