So, in college I had a boyfriend (different one than the one I've been whining about lately). Long story short, while we were together, he assaulted me (the "R" word), and did lots of other bad things. Not long thereafter, I moved away to graduate school, it broke off, and I haven't seen him since. Stopped thinking about him for my own sanity's sake. (I tried to get my brand of revenge, but was thwarted. I was going to out him as a self-fellator to his department in permanent marker, but SOMEONE wouldn't let me in the department lounge. Juvenille? Yes. Deserved? That's the least he deserved.) Fast forward four years. I'm in my own fustercluck. Everyone around me seems happy...blah blah blah. And a Friend decides to pre-emptively tell me....The Douche Who Does Not Deserve a Name is married. The dude who raped me is married. I thought Karma was supposed to be a bitch? Friend has subsequently been told not to give me any more friendly updates about DWDNDaN. She may only inform me of his death, so that I can dance on his grave, because I am not above that.