Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by Krem, Aug 20, 2010.

  1. Krem

    Krem Well-Known Member

    Great, another argument with my mum. Usually when teenagers claim their parents to be idiots, they have the reason that they didn't let them go somewhere, or something similar. I claim mine is an idiot because she has no facts to back her up, and when she has any evidence against her view, she just declines it outright.

    I started complaining about the educational system, and after a while she commented on that I only had to stop saying "I can't", and then I'd pass everything. I then explained to her that I wasn't expecting to fail 10th grade special ed Danish class, but this she ignored, continuing on to say that all it took was to read the book(s) 50 times. Where I reminded her that I don't even remember if I had breakfast this morning, when I woke up, or what was for dinner the past weeks. Again, ignored. I then tried to tell her that it's not a question of will, and even if it was, people have a limited amount. This she denied, stating that everyone has infinite will. I then, using this wonderful tool called sarcasm, reminded her of all the drug addicts in the world, the drop-outs, the homeless, and the ill. She then ended the argument, like she usually does, by stating that she no longer wished to have this conversation. This is the point where contiuing on with anything other than shouting is pointless, so I left.

    And I really, really, REALLY want to shout profanities to her, to express to her my opinion of her debating&reasoning ability, and her intellect. But I have something called 'manners', which stops me.


    That'll be all. For now.
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    she doesn't get you and you don't understand her there is no reason for debate she doesn't understand Mental illness she was taught to fight no matter what that is how she was raised i hope you two can find something to talk about that brings you both together something that does not require intelleigence as you say. She loves you in the end just two different people who don't understand
  3. Krem

    Krem Well-Known Member

    What? This isn't about any mental illnesses. This is about logic, arguing, debating, USING THE SO-CALLED COMMON SENSE.

    I'm still slightly enraged by her, so pardon if I seem rude to you. I wish to be a lot ruder, but I know better.
  4. Daphna

    Daphna Well-Known Member

    I have to say that having been a drug addict and alcoholic in my life I did have the will power to stop, but I did not because I did not want to stop. She is right that you need to stop blaming your problems on other people, and that you need to realize that you are capable of much more once you use your will power to do the best that you can. You are in no shape to judge your mother, and you should give her credit for taking care of you the best that she can. Anyone can do anything once they set their mind to it. You want your mother to listen to you? I would suggest you first show her the proper respect she deserves, and then maybe you would be listened to. But that "wonderful tool of sarcasm," as you put it will only get you looking like a two year old throwing a tantrum because things are not going your way, and will be treated as your attitude deserves. If you are so wise beyond your years as you feel, you would know that respect is earned by giving it to the person you want respect from. The world doesn't owe you squat, get off your butt and put some effort into it! Like your mother I know that you can make it through this, she believes in you and she loves you. Maybe you should focus on that instead of how much you think you know more than her. Just a suggestion. Peace be with you. Blessings..
  5. Krem

    Krem Well-Known Member

    Let's use an example. Depression is caused by chemicals, be they hormones or lack of vitamin b12, or serotonin, for an example. No matter how much you want to, you can not alter your brain just by "willing" it to. You could train yourself, sure, but the chemical imbalance/lack will still be there. There are those who "Just manned up", but they weren't depressed. They were sad, sure, but depression is not a mood.

    Now, where did I blame anything on anyone else? Where did I say that I lacked respect for her? Did you take the "I think she's an idiot, here's why" thing as disrespect? How come I didn't shout at her, then? And why should I respect her? Be thankful, sure, and grateful. But that doesn't mean respect her. Any idiot, and this has been proven numerous times, can have a baby and not kill it for a few years.

    Now, then, anyone can do anything, if they set their will to it? What about the homeless man, the broke schizophrenic, the cripple who wants his leg back, the guy who wants to be a pilot but his eyes aren't good enough, the woman who wants to be rich but is dyslexic with numbers, the girl with MS who just wants to go and run again, the guy with fibrous dysplasia of bone who wants to wrestle, the autistic man who wants to be able to talk to people, the soldier who wants to keep fighting but is bleeding out, and so on.

    Wanting it=|=Getting it, be it because of your social class, physical issues, mental issues, or lack of luck, most people will be average. That's what average means. Why are there so few billionaires? Why are there so few people with doctorates? Why aren't there more athletes who won Olympic gold?

    Because that's how the world works. If you're not born special, you won't be special. (Yes, excessive willpower is a gift. Hence excessive.)

    And I would love to see a 2 year old having a tantrum attack being able to stay calm during an argument. Or being able to use sarcasm, for that matter.

    I was not angry at her for "not getting my way". That's between my, my psychologist, and the Icelandic Educational System. I was angry with her, as you'd know if you read the post, for not using any arguments at all, but instead chanting a mantra, hoping it'll eventually be true.
  6. IV2010

    IV2010 Well-Known Member

    I get it Krem from both sides of the fence....I'm a Mum and I had trouble with school....couldn't remember things if I did read them 50 times so I understand what you're saying.....
    sounds like you're Mum doesn't know how to handle the situation other than talking positive to you and I know that isn't always the solution...

    You made me smile with the last phrase in your first post... :)