Wish I had a girlfriend

Discussion in 'Mental Health Disorders' started by anonymous51, Jun 27, 2007.

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  1. anonymous51

    anonymous51 Staff Alumni

    i really need someone to share my feelings with and support that person through their problems. Why do i have to be such a loser. Every time I try to make friends with new people I end up being awquard and boring and the person doesnt want anything to do with me. I make girls feel embarrased to be around me. Why cant i be full of jokes and charisma, be the life of the party all the time, making friends with everyone i meet. Instead of of a stupid boring failure who got kicked out of school with no chance of getting into university, whose friday nights and weekends consist of sitting up all night smoking and going on the internet on my own in the dark, someone whose too scared to go into town and buy new clothes because he thinks everyone is going to laugh at him and make fun of him. why cant i be like those people in the movies or in emo music, they're outcasts of society but thats what makes them really cool and individual and they all have friends and girlfriends and are really smart. I dont even have the fucking balls to kill myself. I am pathetic.
     
  2. Sil

    Sil Well-Known Member

    I wouldn't take as example movi stars or stuff like that. As a guy without girl like you, I can tell that maybe your results are what you want because you try to be someone else rather than yourself.... people recognize that, and probably if you try to be yourself, things will be better...
     
  3. anonymous51

    anonymous51 Staff Alumni

    but I dont know who i truly am. My personality changes all the time inside and when i do try to talk to people im a completely different person which makes me seem really boring and dull because i have difficulty making conversation. maybe if i had the chance to be myself and be with others i can trust and could connect to you would be right.
     
  4. I understand how it feels to be the outcast of life. You can watch everyone around you have fun, enjoying life, interacting so easily with eachother while you stand there and feel unworthy of the situation even.
    You just need to have more confidence really.
    Sometimes you just have to say, "Screw it...in 10 years this won't matter anyway!" And say that stupid little joke, flirt around a little, get in the middle and talk with people you don't know. Pick someone else around that looks like you feel. Someone else is standing there, feeling the same way--I promise, because I'm one of those people usually.
    Remember we're always here for you. You can always meet some friends online and get together for lunch or something. Believe in yourself :hug: You are not pathetic.
     
  5. resistance

    resistance Staff Alumni

    Hey there, I really do know what you mean. I think I'm boring too and I struggle to make friends, IF i do have "friends" (and I use that term lightly) then they end up hurting me a lot and I feel like I'm actually better off without them. What are your hobbies? The things you enjoy doing? Maybe even think up a new hobby and join up a class or maybe even apply to go to college this year if you can. I know they are huge steps to take, I know only too well, especially seeing as you call yourself an outcast and you think people laugh at you etc but you can make friends and I'm sure people would be your friend. It's unfortunate that the people you have come across disregard you, they are simply not worth your time.

    Your self esteem sounds really low and could do with a bit of a boost and I suggest you read this thread: Click

    This world has billions of people, even though it may feel like the whole world is against you and you won't have any friends - it's not true.

    If you ever want a friend you're welcome to PM me. I know I'm online and not real life but some people consider online friends to be real friends and maybe even better than real life friends, I certainly do. Take care of yourself. :hug:
     
  6. Greenforest

    Greenforest Well-Known Member

    I can agree almost everything, also this. It's stupid feeling when you try to talk to a girl, just to make friends, and you can feel how she thinks you're pathetic and disgusting. She don't want to talk, and next time you see her she don't even want to sit next you like last time, fearing that you might try to hit her again. :rolleyes:

    That's irritating how in entertainment depressed people are presented as dark and mysterious sad persons who are rather cool than losers.
     
  7. anonymous51

    anonymous51 Staff Alumni

    Thats how i feel aswell. Its like the media uses minorties as tools to gain viewers because its so fashionable to be sad and lost, then you get all these posers moping around telling everyone how suicidal they are and most people who are depressed never get found out and keep it to themselves.

    You guys are right though, i do find it easier to talk to others who are similar to me as in they are quiet and not very out-going. but i would prefer to be around really popular people as i feel horrible when others see me as an outsider because that just makes me prone. The last group of people i hung around with where the complete opposites and were really nasty and backstabbing wankers. I didnt have anything in common with them apart from i smoked weed. Then they started to see that i wasnt like them and slowly started making fun of me more and more till i hated going outside but felt i had to because that would just make it worse if they were talking about me behind my back. I didnt see it at the time but i think moving away from my home city was the best thing to happen because now i have a chance to be by myself and sort my head out. But now i dont have any way of making connections with powerful groups of people that make me feel safe from others, and also now i worry about living the rest of my life alone.
     
  8. rd9671

    rd9671 Guest

    You said that you moved away from your home and that it was the best thing that happened. This is very profound. Now is the time that you can be yourself with new people. There are no expectations other than being a human being. Movies and stuff, well, that is just fiction, it has nothing to do with real life at all and I would not recommend emulating that in any way. As far as meeting powerful people, well it has to start somewhere, and that may be with one person in the park or library or a coffe house. A light casual conversation can be about anything. Also remember that friendships take some time to build and they are ever evolving so give it a chance. You will meet people if you go out. Good luck
     
  9. Yea I used to think the same. I had no personality. But the truth is, if you're not like the people you're around you will be boring.

    What interests you? What do you like to think about that YOU ENJOY?

    I'm pretty lame unless you're interested in something like science... then I'm one of the funniest and most interesting people you know.

    Talk about what you know, what interests you, and what you enjoy. And if your friends will think it's stupid... they're not your kind of people

    Do you like music? Argue why your favorite band is the best. Trust me, if you talk about something you like you will be funny and interesting.
     
  10. LetItGo

    LetItGo Staff Alumni

    ignore.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jul 5, 2007
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