Wish my family didnt care

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by wastedmylife, Dec 18, 2008.

  1. wastedmylife

    wastedmylife Well-Known Member

    I can tell they love me in some way, they reach out to me in some way, I left my home a few years ago swallowing all this anger I felt for them and now the anger is still there yet I am a broken down wasted human, now I have to come back in this crippled state I am in yet I still need to resolve the anger issues, I could have saved myself and lived a happy life years ago had I just spoke my mind now I am fucked

    I wish my family didnt love me and didnt give a shit about me, I hate that they care about me

    my brothers birthday is today, I didnt send him a card, he sent me a card last week for mine and he sent me a card when my dog died and I never responded, now I am fucked but I still have to resolve this issues

    unreal, I could have saved myself had I just spoken my mind and bled my heart so they say, and made peace with the situation, now I have to make peace with the situation and I am a fucked person, just a completly wasted person and waste of a life, yet the anger and issues are still there, I could have saved myself 2 years ago yet I am fucked, I am fucked

    just unreal and the worst part is I am not going to die in my sleep and I wont kill myself I just completly decimated and destroyed my life just completly butchered it just annialated it
    Last edited by a moderator: Dec 18, 2008
  2. Dave_N

    Dave_N Guest

    You have to let go of all that built up anger inside of you wastedmylife. It's really not healthy for you. I know that you think that your life is destroyed, but it aint over till it's over. I'm sure there are still a lot of things that you can still do. Life's too short to be angry all the time.
  3. aki

    aki Well-Known Member

    I know what you mean. You wrote exactly what I've felt a lot in my life. But I know if they didn't care about me I'd be more upset...although I would have less emotional baggage and responsibilities in a lot of ways :dunno:
    I kind of agree with Dave, I've read a lot of your threads but didn't know what to say most of the time. You're obviously in a huge amount of emotional pain....and you're so angry. It seems as though your anger at other people and at yourself is completely destroying you inside. I think you need to let it go and try and heal yourself. What's done is done, you've only got the future now.
    If you ever want to talk pm me.