I wish that I could tell those around me how I really feel, that each day at the moment is a struggle, I have panic attacks and can't sleep and find it so hard going outside my front door. I cry my self to sleep and sometimes have night terrors... I told my best friend the other day, how scared I felt when I was having a night terror and she laughed as she's never had one. I try to tell my friends that i love their company but I can't always get out and can't deal with the noise from bars and clubs but they don't understand and ask me after a while why it seems to them, am I being a team player... so now I've given up... I'm too tired to argue, I just want quietness and some sleep.