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Without her...

Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by Menchi, Feb 20, 2008.

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  1. Menchi

    Menchi Well-Known Member

    I don't know what to do without her, i'm finding it so hard to deal with life... like my heart only beats once, lets the happiness go through, but stops, and doesn't beat again...

    Its harder knowing you can be happy, but don't know when you will ever be able to again... maybe i am too evil to be happy for real, but have to have it lingering inside me. i know its there, but it doesn't move while my heart doesn't beat, like torture. But day to day, life numbs it away, only letting the sharp pain of loneliness get inside my head...

    I just want to fly, so i know i can be free, and happy for what time i give myself. I keep thinking how an end would be such sweet relief, i can't deal with this torture of loneliness, knowing everything in the way is myself, because i am not good enough to get anything more than pain.

    Its hard to stop shivering... i don't think i can handle being alone any more.
  2. andyc68

    andyc68 Guest

    know what you are saying, felt that loss and the loneliness but it does get better in time, yeah i know you don't believe it and neither did i but its true.

    it did for me and i thought i would never be happy again.

    but only you can change things and it takes alot of effort but it can work.

    is your life and being happy worth the effort?

    mine is and i changed it all, now i know that the happiness i want is out there and i WILL find it.

    take care
  3. Menchi

    Menchi Well-Known Member

    mine isn't most of the time... i wish i knew how to keep happiness going, not just let it stop, take me back to the dark places.
  4. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    It takes time to deal with a loss and there is no set amount at that. Allow yourself the time to heal. You can get through this. :hug:
  5. Menchi

    Menchi Well-Known Member

    I feel like i am ready to do what i have to now.

    I wish i could see another choice, but i can't. All i am doing is hurting people, wrecking their lives.
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