Perhaps there are not enough colors to be seen. Or perhaps not enough directions to move in. Maybe there were not enough sounds, enough music to be heard. Or perhaps not enough tastes or smells. If there is a god, how in the hell am I going to explain to her or him this thing I want to do? I threw away the greatest opportunity in the universe for a feeling? I can't help but feel my mind is defective. There is reality that my life a futility. There is madness, my mind aroused by unending series of epiphanies that take me in circles. Every flirtation has become perversion and every pride a bluff. I feel without cause and without worth.