World crumbling right beaneath me

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Santana86, Oct 18, 2012.

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  1. Santana86

    Santana86 New Member

    Well idk this is kind of wierd me doing this but whatever. It just seems life cannot get good at any point just feels like I reached the end. It stems from a lot but its just like come on its like I keep running the same circle. For some reason or another I cant treat the people I love the way they need to be treated its like I snap and an ugly side of me appears. I should not be even thinking of this because of my daughter but i've been in and out of her life im scared in a way to be part of her life, my ex-gf left me because sometimes I cant control any of my emotions, I distanced myself from every friend and left a good job for another one then quit that job. I distanced myself from my family as well just always felt like the black sheep.It just feels I reached a point within that doesnt want to go any further I hit a dead end and now I feel boxed in by these emotions. Everybody in my life does not like me and I dont like myself either I got my ex-gf's family to completely despise me I can see why they dont like me and the one thing is I have noone I can turn to or talk to. These feelings wont go away I feel like everything would be just better with me gone. Im just an empty shell of who I use to be I got hit with everything life can possibly deal drug addict family members, never knowing who my father was, I made the mistake of dropping out, and not being there for my daughter, treating my ex like garbage when she was the one who tried helping me the most its all my fault and I just want to end it all already...
     
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Hi so have you tried to get some help for yourself Have you tried therapy to see where all this stems from or how you can change your behavior and thoughts. Lots of therapies that can be tried hun why not talk to your doctor and get help to start changing you now
     
  3. ekki2

    ekki2 Member

    You sound alot like me - minus the details.

    I'm getting help for it. On Monday.
     
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