No matter how much I change or try to make myself better/happier/whatever, the world and society still won't change. And for some reason, I can't just "get over it" and simply accept it for working the way it does. It's not a matter of what I want, it's a matter of I know I can't be a part of it. I can't be part of society. I am going to kill someone. The only question is will it be homicide or suicide. I sometimes get scared because I've been thinking about what it would be like to be a serial killer. I know I couldn't harm a good person but what if I was like Dexter and targeted drug dealers, pimps, criminals, scrum? People that society should get rid of but in fooling ourselves into thinking it makes us "civilized" or will make us the same as them, we don't. I'm going to have to end it soon.