today was my birthday, and it was the worst one i've ever had. i've finally realized i have nothing, the only thing i have to do is to die. i went to work and cut my arm in the bathroom. i felt nothing. when i tried to cut the wrist side, there was nothing. either the blade was too dull or i wasn't trying hard enough. of course on the other side of my arm i have 3 clear cuts. so what if this was my birthday, it's a god damn regular day to the rest of the world. why the hell should i expect today to be any different just because i was born on it. it would have been alot better if i wasn't born at all.