Hi all,
I just need some advice. I am having a real rough few days - the worse I have had in a long, long time. I am very, very worried that I am digging a deeper and deeper hole that I will struggle greatly to climb out of. It seems like my usual methods to pick my self up are no longer working.
What I am really worried about is that I am catching myself swearing at and cursing and berating myself out loud. Something will remind me of something stupid I've done in the past or that I regret and I'll just say out loud something like 'You f*#cking idiot. You should have shot yourself then'. Its almost automatic, it will just pop out before I have a chance to stop myself and pick myself up. Its almost like another person is saying it. Worse yet, and most embarrassing, this is happening more and more around other people, though usually when I am its around other people its under my breath.
Also, something that is worry is this is now occurring around situations I thought were good. For example, the other day I had to do a presentation at work. I thought it went well at first but now I have picked it over and over and I feel terrible about the whole thing. I genuinely regret doing it and think every one thinks I am an idiot. But whilst I was doing and and after I felt fine about it. Whats going on...
I am really very much needing some kind of advice to help stop these occurrences - some sort of method to stop this snap of saying something awful about myself before I have a chance stop my self. Can anyone help me out?
I just need some advice. I am having a real rough few days - the worse I have had in a long, long time. I am very, very worried that I am digging a deeper and deeper hole that I will struggle greatly to climb out of. It seems like my usual methods to pick my self up are no longer working.
What I am really worried about is that I am catching myself swearing at and cursing and berating myself out loud. Something will remind me of something stupid I've done in the past or that I regret and I'll just say out loud something like 'You f*#cking idiot. You should have shot yourself then'. Its almost automatic, it will just pop out before I have a chance to stop myself and pick myself up. Its almost like another person is saying it. Worse yet, and most embarrassing, this is happening more and more around other people, though usually when I am its around other people its under my breath.
Also, something that is worry is this is now occurring around situations I thought were good. For example, the other day I had to do a presentation at work. I thought it went well at first but now I have picked it over and over and I feel terrible about the whole thing. I genuinely regret doing it and think every one thinks I am an idiot. But whilst I was doing and and after I felt fine about it. Whats going on...
I am really very much needing some kind of advice to help stop these occurrences - some sort of method to stop this snap of saying something awful about myself before I have a chance stop my self. Can anyone help me out?