I have a general question and a theory. The question is as I want to die so badly, is it because of whats happened to me over 15+ years or is it because I compare stories to my own and feel as if I can't be beaten. PLEASE don't think I'm being cold, callous and selfish, I'm truly not but over the last two years speaking to people/shrinks etc and reading forums, is it our nature to want to find someone worse off than ourselves, to make us feel better, or is this more proof that I'm so far gone, I've lost whats left of my soul. I know we all have our limits and are made up very differently, so what might make me suicidal, you would laugh at me and say....get a grip and grow a pair. Do we really want to know our limits? The number of lines I've drawn in the sand and said that's it, no more, lets jump, to me now knowing how bad it can really get. Are we suicidal because of whats happened or what may happen? Please feel free for honesty and bashing me up! Getgo ps. I've asked 4 shrinks that question and still not had an answer! Which is why I've told them where to go and how to get there!