writing suicide notes

Discussion in 'I Have a Question...' started by emily83, Sep 17, 2016.

  1. emily83

    emily83 Well-Known Member

    does it help anyone that when you're feeling suicidal, you start writing a note to who ever- detailing your reasons and stuff?

    i've done this so many times!. felt suicidal, wrote notes, felt better and tore them up

    seeing your reasons and your plans down on paper always makes it seem more real and more in focus

    you're not just thinking aloud in your head, you actually have it on a note (plus it helps me practice for the real thing)
     
  2. bobbob

    bobbob Well-Known Member

    Give the real thing a miss if possible. Be kind to yourself.
     
  3. emily83

    emily83 Well-Known Member

    I always thought that committing suicide was meant to be my destiny.

    And i still think that
     
  4. bobbob

    bobbob Well-Known Member

    I think we can to some extent choose our destiny. And it can be long and happy life.
     
  5. SillyOldBear

    SillyOldBear Teddy Bear Fanatic Staff Member Safety & Support

    I don't think it is your destiny Emily. I think we all have choices in this matter. I don't write suicide notes, but I do keep a bit of a diary. That way, when I do pass, whether naturally or not, family will be able to get a sense of what I was feeling. And who knows, maybe in a few years I will read what I wrote and laugh.
     
  6. anyth

    anyth Member

    yes,I have done it twice.And it distracted me.I don`t know what part of writing suicide note is some kind of peaceful but there is a moment when you let out everything and you feel not good not bad,but somehow calm.I can`t really describe that feeling.
    And I agree with reasons,let everyone aside,first you need to be sure,you need to have that reasons,you need to justify yourself to yourself.you need to realize that whatever you are feeling is real and your pain isn`t delusional.
     
  7. Jessicakaire911

    Jessicakaire911 Well-Known Member

    I've tried it before but I just felt worse. I don't know didn't make me feel better
     
  8. emily83

    emily83 Well-Known Member

    thanks all for the replies

    at silly old bear, i used to keep a journal too- i still have it, and write in it sometimes (used to be every day, now just once in a while)

    with regards to choices and choosing our destiny, I believe that to a point- but i think when it comes to feeling suicidal and mental illness, it's not the same thing is it really- i mean you're clouded by so many feelings and emotions, you're just like.. well screw it. i can easily end this
     
  9. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    mean you're clouded by so many feelings and emotions, you're just like.. well screw it. i can easily end this

    Death is not easy not for anyone especially the ones left behind
     
  10. MondoCane

    MondoCane Member

    I've seen once my Future crossing the bridge between Past and Present. ( my own thought)

    (What about the river? What if it was not wide enough?)

    A quote from Jean Giono, from The Horseman on the Roof :
    I know that it is not easy and sometimes it is impossible to make up for ourselves a beautiful life, but nonetheless it is worth trying, let yourself be the judge of your own creation.
    As for the thinking aloud in my own head - I did not practice that and I found out that others do that only after 35 years of age. I cannot communicate with others by thinking in my head, all my own thinking is locked in my black box, and it is happening down under. Only in later years I found that I am able to imagine in my mind different songs or pieces of music without voice or without words, as well as remembering smells or tastes or tactile sensations.
    It is good to be certain about things but the mere instinct of survival is the basis for life and human civilization. Death is the only certainty as it seems but all humans dislike that for sure, while being in the same time the only creatures that are masters and responsible for other human lives, animal and plant lives as well. Maybe some people feel manipulated by others or being born to be used by the more powerful in this world, but as long as we can control at least part of our lively bodies, I think that life is worth living. To do something, anything. I read sometimes that poverty was or it is still the main reason for suicide and I agree that it is beyond one's will sometimes, but even when one is poor, I believe that he can still find some purpose in life.
     
  11. cren

    cren Well-Known Member

    i wrote a suicide note on my diary once.. it's still there.. just in case i do get to do it.. at least i left some sort of explanation behind.. cause i know one day.. i'll do it.. i just know it..
     
  12. Greying

    Greying Substandard

    Ive started a blog.. because there's no one to leave a suicide note to. So when I'm gone my words are out there floating around the Internet, my ashes.
     
  13. Unknown_111

    Unknown_111 Forum Buddy Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    Hi Greying, very much a similar idea to me. I want individuals to know how I felt and what I went through to survive to this day.
     
  14. Greying

    Greying Substandard

  15. Yoyogirl86

    Yoyogirl86 Well-Known Member

    Hi
    I think its good idea simply because, I can see how really bad my mental health and how really bad I am feeling and how really my life is and writing can be quite theraputic as well as place where I can really write about how i am truly feeling even if it just ends up in the bin hours later. It can also be seen a way of showing to a psychiatrist how badly someone feels as evidence rather keeping things bottled and going through your mind all day. I would definitely recommend it, i would suggest to everyone on here is to create an online blog/diary that only you can see and simply use it to document your mental health or simply grab a notebook and pen.
     
  16. Cariad_Bach

    Cariad_Bach Staff Alumni

    Me too.

    I find notes dangerous. By the time I'm writing a note it means I'm making preparations and probably not looking to speak to anyone. I've never felt quite able to get rid of them, either, even if that time and those reasons have passed.